Healing Herpes: Opening Up To Your Dreams
I just spent the past several hours facilitating a Ladies Brunch and workshop on Healing Herpes in my home. What a magical event!
I opened up the afternoon by sharing my story of how fifteen years ago, I contracted herpes on a post college trekking trip high in the Himalayan mountains. I shared how my world came tumbling around me as I faced my greatest fears….that no one would ever love me again and that I would never be able to bear children naturally. Thankfully I was wrong, but I’ll never forget how that tiny, windowless room in a dilapidated backpackers hotel became my cave of isolation for three whole days. An endless stream of tears and waves of despair, anger, shame and frustration overwhelmed me. Would I…could I… have a life after a herpes diagnosis? At that time, the only ray of hope was from the crack of light piercing through the hotel room door. Everything else seemed dark…a mystery waiting to unfold. (Want to read more about my story from shame to love? Click here)
First and foremost, I want to acknowledge the women who shared their stories today at our Pink Tent™ event. It takes a great deal of courage to share your story publicly in a room full of women you have never met. These women stood in their power and shared some of their deepest and darkest secrets and fears. Not only were they brave enough to attend our event, but they took it a step further and dove deep into the emotional facets that bind us from healing herpes. Feelings of shame, guilt, anger and unworthiness were at the core of every story.
Listening to these women tell their stories brought me right back to that windowless room in Katmandu. I recalled how the crack of light from the hallway pierced through my darkest of nights. How at that time, I could have never conceived the life I am living now. My dreams did come true, but back then, the brightness of the sun and the world of possibilities for me would have been too bright for me to embrace. I truly would have been blinded by the light and the plan that God or The Divine had in store for me.
After working with women from around the world, I now realize that some women have lost access to their dreams. They have given up hope and even worse, they self sabotage their future with toxic substances and thoughts of betrayal, guilt, shame,and negative self talk. When I ask them to share with me what they want in life, they respond by saying that they have no idea. They can easily rattle off the things in life that they DON’T WANT, but they are hard pressed to even come up with one thing that they desire. They forgot what it was like to be in their joy and to feel fulfilled in their lives. Herpes was like a thief in the night, robbing these women of their dreams.
Wherever you might be on your journey of healing herpes, your first step is to share your story and know that you are not alone. Life has a way of beating us down and over time we become numb to what else is possible. Sharing your story is cathartic and our Pink Tent™ community is the perfect forum for you to get educated, empowered and inspired. Even if you think you have lost your ability to dream, you haven’t! Herpes can be devastating, but you can pick yourself up and move in the direction of your dreams.
If the word “dream” seems too out there for you or too much, just think of one small thing you can do today for yourself to bring you comfort and joy. What did you used to do when you were a little girl? Did you dance to music when no one was watching? Did you pick flowers or gaze up at the stars in wonderment? Get back in touch with your inner child. Take time to date yourself and fall in love with YOU before you even consider dating again. Go to an art show, take up dancing, or cooking. The KEY to healing herpes is to love yourself; wholly and completely. The best way to do that is to take one baby step in the right direction. Just like that crack of light piercing the night in my hotel room, think of one ray of hope for yourself and do one thing that brings you joy. Chose love and don’t let it slip away. Live. Love. Thrive.
Dr. Kelly Amazon bestselling author of Live, Love and Thrive with Herpes: A Holistic Guide For Women
Hi, my name is Jay I am a college student, and I recently months ago found out that I have (hopefully not for long..and they have a cure) genital herpes..I’ve been only with one guy for a whole year for awhile we didn’t talk for a few months, but he was my first and my first time was a year ago, I never had sex with anyone but with him, he made me feel fine, comfortable, and was patient when it came to being intimate. I noticed some like dryness in the genital area I just figured its because I don’t drink as much water as I should, but I made an appt with planned parenthood, where they after they called me and letted me know that I have genital herpes when I heard that I just blanked out for a good month in a half I would mostly be crying I couldn’t stay in class for long because I just cried. How could this of happened?! If he even told me he was “clean” and I honestly did believe him but now I knew my gut was saying trust your instincts, when I met with him to let him know he at first was in denial because he said he was “clean” and I said well you’re the ONLY person that Iv’e been with..so clearly you’re not, and I had all this information to what he can do just know his options and ext, I just feel at times a lone, I want to cry because this is NOT how I saw this happening, I feel how can someone want to be with me? Other people I know get around way more and they’re okay? Here I am..Ive been with one person and yeah..now when I want to be intimate I know I can’t for awhile and how will someone want to be with me? I feel alone at times, I know this is very common, I know this existed BUT like how I say you really don’t know it’s real until its someone that you know, I just hope things work out for the best and they get better because I have big goals that I will be a WWE Diva, and I hope I can help people who know what I am talking about and understand. I really hope that there is a cure not too long but soon enough where when I do decide to get married/have kids I won’t have to be like okay well we have to do things different to have a family,