Was positive and I’m deveasted lost and scared

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  • #41648
    Vanessa
    Participant

    So ima gonna try to shorten this as much as possible so I’m positive for genital herpes and I didn’t know I had it! After rough sex my skin was becoming raw down there and I thought it was just from the lack of lubricant down there and stuff and then the person I talk to he tells me it burns when he pee.. and I instantly became scared I already had an appointment with the ogbyn and stuff the next day so basically I went there and she looked down there was like oh yeah this look like herpes and I started crying and just was confused and like before I had sex with guy 1 who I’m really close to were damn near in a relationship but We’re single but few days before I went to him I had some sexual intercourse with some guy we’re gonna call him Tom.. and it was a mistake cause we even talked about stds and all that before we did it cause I really didn’t want to but you know the peer pressure.. and then back to where I just got diagnosed at the ogbyn I’m scared as fuck and I instantly think it’s the new guy I call guy 1 up and we’re gonna call him lance.. so I call lance and tell him and he’s pissed and just like huh wtf blah make sure he get tested and all so I call Tom and tell him but he swears up and down he’s clean that it wasn’t from him that he can show me his test results from March and he hasn’t been with anyone since before his test results and so basically lance hasn’t been there for me honestly he been playing the blame game and shit but I call the ogbyn to confirm is it actually herpes and I was confirmed to be positive for genital herpes and she said it was a past exposure that I was exposed to it 6 weeks ago and I was just like what!? So it’s not the new guy.. and 6 weeks ago it could’ve been either two guys lance.. or another guy we’re gonna call him .. Peter but the timeline matches perfectly with lance and these are guys I been doing things with I thought I felt safe cause I got tested in feb after I been with them and was negative ! So anyways I tell Peter I call him and he’s like calm but he’s like “ no it couldn’t of been me I get tested regularly and that he hasn’t been with anyone but me after his ex and after his ex he got tested but he will go get tested and he’s gonna lmk “ so I tell lance it could’ve been from him and he’s just not believing it at all continuing to say it’s me and saying he used a condom but I read if someone is having a outbreak and they use a condom they can still get it and honestly I need some friends to vent to I need a little support group I. Don’t know what to do I’m really devastated

    #41653
    Yola
    Participant

    First and foremost I am really sorry you are going through this. Shit happens! And at this point you will drive yourself nuts trying to figure out who gave it to you so don’t bother.

    Cry it out be sad about it. It’s going to be a while. I found out in feb and I am still processing it but it is safe to say i am in a better place mentally. And also know you are not alone.

    HsV can happen to just about anybody even with safe sex and a lot of people do not know they have it. They are asymptomatic carriers, just like me.

    Cry it out as much as you need to, talk to close friends you can confide in. And you will realize how many of your own friends actually end up coming out to you about a STI they have or may have had too.

    You are not alone and you will get through this. It is a lot to process.

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