Telling a love partner

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  • #44663
    Paloma
    Participant

    Hi all, I was just diagnosed with the HSV-2 virus. Frustrating, because I had a gynecological exam in May and I was clear of STD’s. But, about two weeks ago I noticed a pimple-looking bump on my labia. Went into the doctor for a new exam, this time with a blood test. Tested positive for Herpes 2.

    After seeing that first pimple (before the doctor examination) I ordered Valtrex and a cream from Wisp online. That cleared up the one bump on my labia. Have started on a 500 dosage of Valtrex daily (lots of stomach upset!). Was hopeful that would “squash” the virus so I’d have no more outbreaks. This morning I found a couple of bumps on my left thigh. So, have increased the Valtrex to 1000 mgs twice a day and started putting the cream on them again.

    Frustratingly, the doctor who called to tell me I had the virus didn’t recommend a suppressive “unless you have many outbreaks a year because it can be hard on your kidneys”. I was like, “WHAAAATTT?”. Easy for her to say!

    I started seeing a new, wonderful man in January of this year. Not sure if he is the one who gave this to me. Haven’t been with anyone else. How likely is it he is the one who gave this to me? He is truly my dream man and I am SO scared if I tell him, it will scare him off.

    Tried to see him today, but he said “I am not good this weekend”. Do you think he isn’t good because he is having an outbreak? How likely is it I had this before we met and could have accidentally passed it to him? This is just a horrible situation overall, I am truly devastated with this news and how it will affect my love life and potential to get married! Any advice is welcome. 🙁

    #44665
    J
    Participant

    Hi! I am newly diagnosed too. I understand what you are going through. You have to tell him. If it scares him off, he’s definitely not your dream guy and let him go. The guy who gave this to me told me about his herpes AFTER we already had unprotected sex. It feels terrible to be lied to, and I’m sure it didn’t feel great for him to hide it from me either. I know this is hard right now…but your love life will be okay! You will absolutely find someone who loves you for you. Trust me! <3

    #44698
    hopelessnow71
    Participant

    I totally understand as well. I myself didn’t know how to tell the wonderful man in my life as well and I didn’t know how I caught this and I thought maybe he had a cold sore something and he didn’t know about it in his mouth and during our physical time accidentally passed that on to me since the simplex one is normally a cold sore on the mouth.
    He did his blood work and he came back negative and hes going to test again in a few weeks I was so shameful to even bring it up to him and he has taken this so well that I am feeling really overwhelmed less than the dirt of the Earth like I really feel disgusted with myself and I’m having a very hard time.
    If this man is really a genuine good man for you then maybe he’ll be just as my guy is and be mature about it I honestly can’t think of why my guy is being so damn good I’m struggling with it he has everything going for him.
    I really hope everything turns out OK for you, feel out the situation, I personally brought it up and told him via text message I couldn’t tell him verbally.

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