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Hi everyone!
I’m Melissa, I’m 23 years old and I was diagnosed with HSV2 yesterday. For some odd reason, the only thing I’m afraid of is experiencing an outbreak since I’m pretty sure I’ve had this for a while and have been asymptomatic. Here’s my story:
My partner and I have been together for 4 years. When him and I started to get serious, he told me that he has HSV-2, way before we were even intimate. When he told me about it, I wasn’t scared or phased by it. He educated me and I did my own research and spoke with my doctor and what not obviously I wanted to continue to pursue the relationship. Fast forward to today, we’ve been engaged since July of this year (I GET TO MARRY MY BEST FRIEND!!!!)
ANYWHO. This week, I went to the doctor’s office to get myself checked because I had abdomen pain, which turned out to be middleschmertz. I also did some blood work too because I told my doctor that my fiancé and I are talking about having kids next year and whatnot. Yesterday my bloodwork came back, and I came back positive for HSV-2. It took me a little bit of surprise but I was prepared for this to happen (as weird as that sounds). When he and I first started dating, he told me that he has HSV2 and it was given to him by his ex-girlfriend. I wasn’t scared or phased because I had surface knowledge and I know there wasn’t any information that I wouldn’t be able to obtain because all I had to do was talk to my doctor.
When, I got the results, I told him right away. He was really really sad and upset that he gave it to me. I validated how he felt and I reassured him that nothing is changing for us because of this. because the truth is, I could’ve had this 3-4 years ago and only found out now that I have this with the bloodwork. Not only that, I’ve never had an HSV2 outbreak at all since him and I have been together for 4 years. At this time, I personally don’t feel like much has changed for me. I don’t love him any less, I don’t have any anger, and resentment. I truly don’t have any negative feelings because
1. It’s not a burden. It’s never affected our relationship, and I’m confident that it won’t affect us. We just need to continue to remain healthy and symptom-free (he hasn’t had an outbreak since 2018 and I haven’t had anything yet!)
2. I know it’s more common than people think. More common than I even think!
The only negative feeling I have is knowing that my fiancé is being so hard on himself and it hurts me to see him like that. But other than that, I think part of me is sharing this because of the stigma around it, the “societal punishment”. But I feel okay and I just needed to get this off of my chest but I’m also in need of some encouragement!
Hi Melissa, I’m honestly inspired by your positive attitude. I was diagnosed about three weeks ago and reading your post made me feel better about the diagnosis. You were so fortunate to not have had an outbreak thus far, I hope for your sake that you get to be asymptomatic for life. I did not get quite that lucky, however, it was nothing that I couldn’t handle. Thank you for the positive attitude, I think that was some thing I really needed to read right now. Hope you’re still doing well!
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