New diagnosis, please help me! I feel so alone and depressed

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  • #44669
    pinktentuser
    Participant

    Hi everyone,

    I’m a 20 and have recently been diagnosed with genital HSV1 about 3 months ago. I feel like I am still in shock by the diagnosis, I suffer with contamination ODC and hsv1 + hsv2 were the main ‘germs’ I was terrified to catch and have on my hands/phone etc. So you can imagine how upset I was when I was diagnosed with it!

    I know exactly who I got it from and I have only seen him once after my diagnosis (around 3 weeks after my initial outbreak) but we still text and things like that. I haven’t told him or anyone else. The only people that know are my doctor and a nurse that did my swab test. I feel so isolated and alone and due to my contamination OCD feel like I’m a walking infectious disease. I know I’m not rationally thinking but I just wanted to get this out and hopefully spark a conversation with some of you ladies on here as this forum has really helped.

    I would just like to know other people’s experiences with genital hsv1, how many outbreaks have you had? How do you get over feeling so alone and depressed? How have you told partners etc. Anything would be a great help! I just wanted to finally tell someone (albeit strangers on the internet LOL) xx

    #44671
    Rae
    Participant

    Hello there. The more you read up on you will quickly see you are not alone. However no one likes to talk about this in person
    I agree im glad we have this forum. The man who told me he had it after hiding it from me told me he’s had it for over 30 years and never knew what it was til the internet started coming out. He never even went to the doc to get an official test or anything he just pushed through it as he was so embarrassed from the beginning and felt alone. So im glad i got more support then he ever did because that’s what i need right now. Im a month in from my first outbrake so im so new but i can you bring alone is something your not. Im glad your here.

    #44674
    pinktentuser
    Participant

    Hi
    Thank you so much for your reply! It’s so comforting to be able to speak to people about this as I have felt too embarrassed to tell anyone in my personal life. I’m not sure how you feel but I tend to go in phases. Sometimes I think positively and read statistics about how common it really is but then other times i spiral and get so sad and feel so isolated.

    #44693
    Lorena
    Participant

    Hello! I hope you’re feeling better today. I got my diagnosis hours ago and I feel so lost. I don’t know what to do or how to even look at myself. I’ve never had an outbreak.

    #44713
    sugar
    Participant

    Hi,
    I was recently diagnosed in June with a first outbreak of HSV-1, and haven’t had a outbreak since. like you I have feared contracting herpes all my life and when I got it I was in complete denial. I still am having a hard time coping but I honestly have been feeling healthy and have had no other symptoms of the herpes virus since my initial outbreak. I recommend you read Kelly’s book it helped me immensely with coping and treatment for the virus.
    I do recommend telling you partner it will relief alot of stress and anxiety for you. I finally told my best friend/partner and he handled it better than I thought he would although I was prepared to be rejected, I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t tell him and he became infected.
    Im going through the same thing that you are. Remember that you are not alone, we are not alone.

    #44723
    embrassed4670
    Participant

    I am sorry for all who was not informed. I’m feeling alone as well. I am a 61 year old grandmother who has been with the same man for 16 years. We had sex on October 5 and I had an full blown first ever out break on Saturday the 9th. I didn’t know what was going on because of I an auto immune condition called Lichen sclerosus which affect the vaginal area in post menopausal women. I assume that was flaring up. I got an appointment with the doctor first thing Monday morning and the PA informed me I had contracted genital herpes. I was in tears, afraid and alone. I called my man who didn’t even blink or seems surprised. I am not sure why I am not mad at him. I told him he should go get tested right away and he has made no move to get tested. So I can only assume he knew he was a carrier. Betrayal.
    E4670

    #44728
    Rae
    Participant

    Betrayed i think is all of our feelings. Please don’t let this eat your relationship alive. Im 3 months in. It’s not the end of the world as i thought when i first found out. Im sorry your here but your not alone.

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