New diagnosis and relationship support

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    I was recently diagnosed with genital herpes. I’m in a long term relationship, and this journey after being diagnosed has been tough on both of us. He has tested negative and believes I have cheated on him. I have been faithful the entire relationship, and contacted my exes and they have tested negative as well. I feel really stuck, lost, and misunderstood. I’m unsure on how to navigate this situation. I would appreciate any support or advice that anyone has to share.


    I’ve been googling and reading on this. I’m in a similar sitauation, my last relationship ended at the beginning of September and I broke out November. Now, according to everything I’ve read, if you get infected by someone you break out 2-14 days after “the encounter”. Now this is not possible as Ive seen no action in 8 weeks! However, i have been under immense stress and I’ve found a few bits here and there about stress can “awaken” the virus (much the same as Coldsores appear when low or ill). Could this be the same for you, or being down / run down? I admit in my very much younger years I was carefree, maybe I was infected then and it’s just been within me “sleeping” until now, maybe its the same for you? Ex-partners may not even know they have it. Its horrible and I feel for you because when people hear herpes they think the worst. They dont get it and will instantly argue that you’ve done them dirty. I considered ending my life when I found out because I knew nothing other than what everyone else thinks! All I can say is research with your partner, ask Google questions, find medical papers on line on it. It won’t answer where it came from but it gives you understanding that it isn’t always something you’ve done this week / month / year…. it could be from a long time ago. I really hope it works out for you x


    Ive heard sometimes STDs in general lay dormant until they are triggered by sex. this has happened to me twice. once when i had chlamydia and then again when i contracted herpes. When i got herpes i had just started having sex with my new boyfriend at the time. Something didn’t feel right, and i started having a breakout. the last time i had sex before that was a few MONTHS prior. Why on earth would i have thought i got anything when i had no symptoms for months! He took it well at first but we broke up now and of course blames me and thinks i did it to him on purpose. anywho…i think it varies by person on how it effects you.

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