Hi, I’ve been seeing this guy for a year now and he’s always been the nicest guy in the world, he was my brother’s friend And in the last few months we have got so much closer it was all perfect. Yesterday he told me he had got Genital herpes from a one night stand 5 years ago, we have been having unprotected sex and he said he didn’t think you could transfer it when it was dormant. I feel really betrayed that he wasn’t more careful and took away my choice to decide. I’m now terrified I have it and don’t know what to do, what is the liklihood of me having it? We had sex last week and now I swear I’m feeling itchy and am panicking, he says he wants to spend the rest of his life with me but I’m finding it hard to accept that he’s broken my trust and put me at risk, what do I do? What are the risks? Am i allowed to be angry at him?
The most important thing is to get tested first, and after that, you can take decisions. Hopefully, he didn’t transmit it to you since he has it for 5 years and he can recognize symptoms. The probability is high, but, again, get tested first. Request a blood test with your doctor, you will get results in 2 or 3 days.
Yes. You have all the right to be betrayed and it is normal. He had to disclose it to you and you deserved to know it.
Yes. You have all the right to be angry at him.
Some people with herpes, normally, with time, break with the stigma by their own and think they should not tell partners, and it is wrong. Let him explain why he didn’t disclose it.
I hope you are doing better.
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