Just Diagnosed…. So lost and confused

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Viewing 13 posts - 1 through 13 (of 13 total)
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  • #41280
    Leigh03
    Participant

    Hi all, I am just about a month out from receiving the news. I instantly chose to do the medication and looked up anything else to help with it and started taking lysine as well (1000 mgs a day) its been a tough month because I have had what I believe is out break after out break so I can’t give any information to help as if it really truly helps. I had no symptoms up until the outbreak I had in Feb, which when I went, the Dr. told me it was from shaving and didn’t look like anything and just checked for urine testing STDs. When I went back because I knew something wasn’t right, she did the actual testing and it was type 2. I cried, locked myself in my room, drank a box of wine, and still can’t get myself to get out there and try dating. I am the prude one of all my friends- never even had a one night stand- how could this happen??! I’ve had such bad luck with guys to begin with how can this make it any easier?! Needing friends that are in the same boat please!

    #41286
    Riley
    Participant

    Hey Leigh03!

    I’ve been in this for a year. Just recently joined this forum after a serious mental break down. Been diagnosed for a year with HSV-1 on my genitals. I’ve had sex with 5 guys and I got it from someone I never thought I would ever get an STD from. I trusted him. Guys never liked me in high school and I at first thought this just rebooted my insecurities. But after a year I found a new respect for myself. It has been hard, but I just keep reminding myself that the right guy is out there. Keep you’re head up and always ask for help if you need it. That’s where I went wrong. I just now started asking for help. I thought I could handle this myself, but I’ve found the support of others helps tremendously. Good luck to you
    Riley

    #41289
    Ash93
    Participant

    Hey Leigh03, I was just diagnosed yesterday and having my first outbreak. I am so confused I have been with my bf for over a year and a half and was cleared of all STIs and STDs 9 months ago. I knew he was prone to cold soars but when they told me that him giving me oral sex while have that cold sore has now caused me to have genital herpes it destroyed me. I feel I’m in a fog that this couldn’t be real. I’m in so much pain physically and mentally I don’t know what I should do. I also just here for advice on how to cope mentally and ideas physically to reduce the pain of the outbreaks 😕

    #41332
    Steph79
    Participant

    I too am the prude one of all my sisters! I have been very loyal to my husband of 20 years, and he recently had an affair and brought me home a present – HSV2. He claims that he doesn’t have it ’cause he has no symptoms, but I too don’t have symptoms but had the common sense to get tested after finding out about the affair. And voila, blood test came back positive! 🙁 With that, amongst other things that I’ve found out about recently, I put my foot down and ended our 20 year stint (and have been in therapy for the past few months, which really has helped). All we can do is hang in there, and talk it out with others.

    #41333
    Janjan
    Participant

    Hey everyone! I’ve been on this journey for over a year now and it’s been SUCH a struggle. I’been through every single emotion you have and through therapy (mental) and I am also on suppressive medication. This last year has been difficult and transformative – do I tell? What is my future going to be like? Everyone’s journey is different but it’s been the hardest, weirdest and also best year of my life. I am still sexually active and have learned to manage so much. I have also become so informed on Herpes (type 1 and 2) it’s crazy. Let me know if you have ANY questions I will answer anything and help (obviously I am not a doctor!). People have helped me (a lot of my friends have it too). There is nothing to be ashamed of. Please reach out because i still have questions too. We’re all in this together.

    #41338
    sweetpea7177
    Participant

    I contracted HSV 17 years ago. It was devastating and I thought my life was over. Let me assure you, you still have a life ahead of you and men will still want to be with you. I was always up front about HSV with a potential partner. I had ONE who told me he couldn’t move forward. HIS loss. (And i dated plenty after the diagnosis.) At the time i didn’t believe that but I know it to be true now. I eventually found the love of my life, we married and had two beautiful children (vaginally). When i have an outbreak, sometimes i get down. They generally happened once a year at most but recently (I’m 48 almost 49) they’ve become much much more frequent which I’m trying to figure out how to handle. I believe it’s connected to me being perimenopausal. But my husband is super supportive of me. He has not contracted by the way. I just want all of you ladies to know you deserve love and will find it. You WILL. And if they don’t accept you with it, they’re not for you. But you know that already. Find that stupid silver lining 😉 Mine was this taught me to weed out the creeps and expect more which i wasn’t doing previously…obviously because i wasn’t careful with who i shared my body with. All the best to you ladies. Happy to chat more if anyone would like to. Xo

    #41345
    Shar
    Participant

    Hi everyone…I was diagnosed Sept of 2019 and I realllllly couldn’t grasp it… was given to me unknowingly and I promised myself that I would never do that to anyone else. I was recently talking to a great guy and after 3 weeks of knowing him I decided that I could trust him enough with this very personal issue. He couldn’t deal with the idea of possibility contracting it so he told me that we could be friends in the future. I decided that if I was not “worthy enough” to be accepted with this virus as something more than a friend, then the latter wouldn’t do for me. It feels horrible to be rejected for something that I didn’t even ask for… which is most of our cases, but the way I’m trying to look at it is…the right guy won’t reject me, he’ll love me, with all my flaws and virtues. Every day is a little battle overcome. Baby steps… good luck everyone and keep your head up. You’re still YOU…HSV doesn’t define you.

    #41369
    Innocent
    Participant

    Hi Shar your comment is really encouraging. I think I’m losing my 10-week-in boyfriend but ya I’m happy to know that there’s someone who’s keeping her chin up no matter what 😀

    #41619
    Lynn
    Participant

    My emotional pain is so bad, even after 7 months of diagnosis.
    No one will have my story. My husband died Sept 26th, last year. He had been sick many years. We were married 42 years and faithful. 3 weeks after he died I had terrible rash and pain. I had never had any symptoms and neither had he. I cannot understand if this could lie dormant all these years. He had many partners before me, I know. But like I said, we were so in love and never had any thoughts of cheating.
    The embarrassment of being 65 years old and having this is too much to bear. I never slept around. I can never tell anyone and will never date again. The thought of 20 or 30 more years alone makes me so sad. I’m healthy otherwise with no medical problems.
    So many nights I just lie awake and cry. I am ashamed even though I know it’s not my fault. And he did not know he had it either as neither of us had symptoms through our long marriage.

    #41620
    mythicalpam
    Participant

    I just got diagnosed yesterday. I’m sure you’re going thru alot of emotions. Try to not let them overwhelm you.

    #41863
    shandyy1234
    Participant

    Sweetpea7177 would you mind chatting with me about some things please?

    #41867
    Christy
    Participant

    Hi everyone! I’m Christie,
    I was diagnosed in feb 2020 and I must say it was most definitely hard as rocks for me both mentally and physically. My first outbreak I had 30+ sores!… I guess my immune system is weak as hell. It was so hard to walk I was numb for a whole month. I cried everyday all day. I was a zombie in class.. I attend college btw. Every time I have an outbreak it starts all over again.. the mental trauma.. the disappointment.. the shame.. the question of will I ever get married and who will want me? I contracted the disease from my boyfriend… I waited a whole year to have sex with him. I noticed very small bumps surrounding the head of his genitals but never payed any mind because I had seen such bumps before which were normal for the individual. Unknowingly we had unprotected sex and in two weeks I saw one sore then two then three then 30. It was sooo painful! I have so much problems managing mines as it happens after my period every month. I don’t know how to cope sometimes but I’m getting there and I would love to talk to others if you wanna help get through it together. I recently shared my secret with an adult figure who is my best friends mom and she told me to keep my head up…I’m not the first and I won’t be the last… that it could have been worse and to thank God for the little things cause it could have been more life threatening like HIV/Aids. After that talk I’ve been better.. I’m getting over the shame. My boyfriend had no clue he had it and he was devastated.. he cried and said he had ruined my life and wished sometimes he was dead. Clearly it hurt him to know he did that to me. But he takes care of all my medical bills which I’m thankful for also because I’m a struggling college student. So I hope it all works out for you guys and I promise this thing only weeds out the bad guys and allows you to find your true love… the person God has chosen for you 😘

    #41868
    Christy
    Participant

    Hey we can be friend I’m newly diagnosed too maybe we can help each other ?

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