November 30, 2018 at 8:00 am #22637
I can’t tell you the comfort it brings me seeing that I’m not by myself. It started out with what I thought was a run of the mill yeast infection, and a weird burning lesion on my anus that has since become my most painful issue.
I was in so much pain last night I ended up at the hospital, there was cramping, bloating stabbing, burning, dizziness, nausea.Pretty much you name it and it was happening to my vagina. I can’t even sit in the bath tub or let water hit my vagina, it’s too painful and it forces this response that makes it feel like I’m being kicked over and over again.
The wait at the ER last night was the worst pain of my life, the worst moment and I didn’t even get to see a doctor. My beloved fiancée held me for six hours as I cried in crippling pain, begging for help. I felt so alone and isolated and like no one cared about me.
We have an amazing local std clinic, and they see people quickly. So I went there and after some assessment the nurse said that she thought I had genital herpes and prescribed me with valtrax just to be safe. After all the research I’ve done since getting home, I agree with her diagnosis and hope it’s correct so that this medicine will take my pain.
I’ve been with my partner exclusively for five years, and no one else so this diagnosis is coming out of no where. It’s a huge surprise.
He’s incredibly supportive and would love and care for me no matter what, but I still feel terrible. Frightened that these outbreaks won’t ever stop, frightened that it’s going to hurt forever and that the valtrax is always going to make me feel tired and nauseous…..
I’m scared that it’s always going to be like this and that I’ll lose everything, my future husband, my career that I’ve worked so hard to build, my sex life, my physical capabilities.
I know in reality that won’t happen, but it just feels so frightening right now.December 27, 2018 at 10:49 pm #24756
Thank you for your willingness to share your story. You are right, dear one– you are not alone. However, if can feel that way when we have our first outbreak when we get the diagnosis and move forward.
I am glad you have your fiancee to help you through the pains.
Typically, the first outbreak is by far the very worst. That has been the case for most people. The emotions you expressed above are very reminiscent of how I and others I know have felt. So, I hope you are comforted to learn that in that regard you are not alone, either.
There are many things you can do to help decrease the number of outbreaks and it all revolves around boosting your immune system and keeping it on an optimal level, stress management, knowing what your personal triggers are ( foods, stress, hormone change, etc).
Read The Herpes drop down section of this website for a lot of great info.
I hope your pains and worry has subsided.
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