How to cope with giving boyfriend herpes

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  • #39472
    Amelia
    Participant

    Myself and my boyfriend were together for over a year before he got genital herpes.i was on suppression therapy and always used condoms but about a month ago he got a sore and was diagnosed with hsv2 .I have struggled to come to terms with it as I did everything to try and protect him and feel like I couldn’t have done anything else ….I also haven’t had any sores for around 3 years so much have been shedding.has anyone else had this experience and how do you deal with the guilt and ahame?

    #39479
    Lisa
    Participant

    You did all anyone could do. Are you sure he wasn’t an asymptomatic carrier when you met? Had he tested negative at that time?

    #39480
    Lisa
    Participant

    Given your precautions, according to my understanding anyway, he faced a 1% risk per year of acquiring herpes from you.

    #40057
    Mom333
    Participant

    I came to this forum for the exact same reason. I was up front with my boyfriend. I’ve had it for 14 years and rarely get outbreaks. If I even felt an inkling of weirdness or tingling we remained abstinent, I took the acyclovir, and then used condoms for a week after. We’ve only been together six months and now he thinks he has it. I know I did what I could but I also feel so awful. I’m sorry I don’t have answers for you as I’m slogging through the same feelings but I can offer that you’re not alone. I was trying to protect him. I love him. I was honest with him. Yet, it’s still hard and sad to feel the burden of passing it on.

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