How do I live?

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  • #19741
    moni
    Participant

    I went to an urgent care about a week and a half ago and I just got that heart wrenching call yesterday, on Valentine’s day of all days. I was at work on a five minute smoke break so I didn’t have time to really talk to the woman and let it sink in but when I got off of work I sat at the bar and that’s when it really hit me, I called a really close friend who tried to tell that I would be ok but I know I won’t be. I will never be the same who’s going to want me I will never have my own family and I truly feel as if life is over. I haven’t confided in my best friend because I believe that she will just say “i told you to stop messing around with him” which she is clearly right but I don’t want to hear it and that’s not what I need to hear either. I haven’t even said anything to him yet but I don’t know what to say or how to let the words come out of my mouth. Is it crazy that I’m not even mad at him but I’m furious with myself I can’t believe I was so stupid and I now have to live with this for the rest of my life. I just wonder if there’s ever a way to get a false positive I’m going to get tested again by my gynecologist and I was thinking that I should wait to talk to him until after I go see my doctor. I’m so empty inside and I feel so lost at 24 yrs old I’m ruined and I’m going to be alone for the rest of my life, how do I live with this?

    #19742
    Dr. Kelly
    Keymaster

    Moni,

    Your life is not over even though it might seem like it is right now. Please stop beating yourself up. You could have gotten this from anyone. Even the good guys carry the virus, many whom don’t know they have it.

    The fact of the matter is that at least 1 in 4 women have genital herpes despite the fact that very few talk about it. If your best friend has been supportive in the past, then I encourage you to open up and tell her. There is nothing like the unconditional love of a good friend.

    In the meantime, I encourage you to get properly educated so that you can feel empowered to move forward with your life without constantly looking in your past. Know that you can and will have all that you desire if you place your attention on it.

    Move in the direction of your dreams. It’s all still possible for you!

    Live. Love. Thrive.
    Dr. Kelly

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