Has anyone engaged in legal action about their diagnosis?

[ForCoils]

I am newly diagnosed and really struggling. But I am empowering myself by taking legal action against the man who infected me. He lied about being divorced (and many other things) and I worry that if he isn’t called out, he will continue to spread HSV to others. Has anyone here engaged in legal action over this? I welcome any positive or negative feedback you are willing to share.

[finn012361]

I wrote the woman who does the positively positive podcast asking a similar question after my diagnosis and unfortunately this was her reply…

‘As far as legal action, you would have to be able to prove that you didn’t have it beforehand, which means previous negative blood tests for antibodies – which most people don’t have. You would also need his test results proving he did have it, dated before you contracted it yourself, in order to prove it was intentional transmission. If you do have those, you can think about the next thing you’ll need to prove – that you have not had intimate contact with anyone other than your husband. It’s a hard thing to prove, and lawyers will rip your character apart trying to discredit you. You will also need to prove that you did not know he had it – which can come down to a messy he-said/she-said.
If money for lawyers and time aren’t a constraint, you can give it a go and I’d definitely be interested to hear what happens.’

It seems very similar to other sexual assault cases and the burden of proof is placed on the victim unfortunately and the nature of this virus allows people lacking morals to abuse others. It is really sad and hard to accept… at least it has been for me.

I do believe it is necessary to ‘expose’ the behavior because I think silence only helps the perpetrator continue to potentially infect others although even exposure is no guarantee. In my case, my husband knew that he was infected for more than 30 years and he had never disclosed to any of his partners before having sex. If even one of those previous partners had addressed his behavior, he may have corrected himself and treated me differently, but of course I have no way of knowing this for sure. I told mutual friends and his mother. No one really wants to hear this or know it… so please steel yourself for unpleasantness should you decide to go this route.
I wish you the best, take care of yourself.

[Author]

Posts