Well, today I tested positive. I remember bursting into tears. I had prayed and prayed that it would come back negative. I’m crying as I’m writing this actually and the appointment was 3 hours ago. Honestly, when I first heard it the news I didn’t want to be alive anymore. Still kinda feel that way. I feel like my world is crashing down around me. For days I have been telling myself that it was going to be negative. That I was going to be fine, that the doctors were wrong. How am I going to date? Whose going to want to date me? Let alone have kids with me some day? I don’t plan on telling my family. I don’t think I can deal with the shame that I know I’m going to feel. I can hardly handle it now. The only plus right now is that my best friend since 7th grade is sticking by me. I don’t know what I would do without her. She is literally my best friend in the whole world. I called her and just broke down and it felt good to tell her everything that I’ve been feeling these past few days. I still feel like I’m in a dream and I’ll wake up and I won’t be positive. But I know that’s not going to happen. I’m going to have this for the rest of my life and I’m going to have to be careful. Something I thought I was doing. Clearly I am very wrong. It’s funny how this is more devastating than testing positive for tb at 12. And that was something that could’ve killed me if I hadn’t gotten treatment. Definitely one hell of a Christmas present. I know that I’m not alone in this but right now I feel like I’m alone. Sure I have the support of my best friend and some other friends but they don’t get it. And everyone on here has been amazing, I just feel scared. What is my future going to hold? Is my mental health going to hold is the real question. I already have bad depression, I think it might be time to go back on my antidepressants. I honestly feel really numb, but I know I’m going to cry again later. This all just feels like a dream. Like it’s happening to someone else. I never thought in my life that I would have an STD. But yet here I am.
Topic: The waiting game
Well I was suppose to go and get my results and further testing done today. They called and said that they didn’t have my results and that’s why they wanted me to schedule a follow up appointment. So now I have to wait till Wednesday at 3:30. My anxiety has been all over the place. I’m praying that the fact that I haven’t had any of the symptoms that they told me to watch out for is a good sign. I just hope that it’s good news because I’ve missed a few classes and a few days of work because I’ve been so depressed and nervous. I can’t wait for this waiting game to be over. I’ve never been so scared for test results and I’ve had to go through treatment after testing positive for the skin test if TB at the age of twelve. I’m more scared now than I was back then and that was something that could kill me. Funny how those things work out. Now I’m rambling, anyways I’m praying these test results come back negative. Since this whole ordeal my perception on STDs and other sexual diseases have changed drastically. I use to have a negative outlook on them, now I see that it can happen to anyone. I hate the way I viewed it before, because I’m not a judgmental person. But this experience has opened my eyes to a whole new outlook.
Topic: Oral sex
Hello, thanks for taking the time to read my post! I wanted to ask if anyones had experience with herpes and oral sex. I am a young thriving 23 year old woman and I want to continue dating. Granted, it will be slightly challenging, i try not to give up hope for myself in finding the perfect partner. Although I didn’t think i’d be finding him a month after my diagnoses. YIKES. Long story short, I want to be able to pleasure him and receive pleasure from him in the form of oral sex. I am on suppressive therapy as well as taking supplements to boost my immune system. I had my initial outbreak a month ago and it appeared genitally but I have HSV-1. I had one sore on my lip but using powerful lip treatments it cleared up in days. do you have experience giving or receiving oral? please share!
Topic: 4yrs in…the malaise sucks!
This month is my four year ‘herpaversary’, after an extreme reaction to the first outbreak, I was eventually put onto suppressive treatment as it just wouldn’t go away. I’ve just recently been able to reduce my meds without consequences (although have just had an outbreak…), and have made lifestyle changes – however could still make even more lifestyle changes I admit. My issue is that I suffer with malaise more than anything else because of the herpes and I know at these times my body needs healthy food and exercise, but because I feel so rubbish, the only thing I want is comfort food and to snuggle up on the sofa. This can go on for a couple of weeks or more. Does anyone else have a similar struggle?
I was recently diagnosed and have been obsessing over all things related. I am still trying to cope with the diagnosis and had a few questions.
What treatments have worked best for you? Suppressive therapy, oils, ointments, etc.
Has anyone had a false positive blood test? I was a 1.6 on the IGM blood test and .14 on the IGG test. I am wondering if I should have labs drawn again to confirm. I had one sore with lower back pain. I asked for a herpes lab test, although my MD thought the sore was an ingrown hair.
Can I give my partner HSV2 during oral sex?
Topic: HSV 1 and Varicella Zoster
I’m glad I found this site because I’m not coping very well with my diagnosis.
Three months ago, I had a single bump on my vagina. It was a bit itchy and, like most, I thought it was razor burn as I had just shaved down there. I kept an eye on it as it started to hurt. A few days later, more smallish bumps appeared. They were itchy and painful. I tried home remedies which helped but I ended up in urgent care because I was in so much pain. I had read it was possible you could get shingles in that area and, since I am on an immunosuppressant drug, I thought that’s what it was. The doctor prescribed an antiviral and in days, I felt so much better. I still went to my PCP and asked him to run the varicella IGM/IGG tearing and HSV type 1 & 2. The varicella test came back positive both IGM &IGG antibodies. The HSV testing was cancelled because my dr ordered it wrong. No big deal, I asked him to order it again and I’d be in whenever I could.
I received my results yesterday. Negative for hsv 2 but positive for hsv 1. I’ve never had a cold sore in my life! Everything I’m reading says you can get HSV 1 down there when someone performs oral sex. I know the virus sheds but HSV 1 shedding isn’t supposed to occur as much as HSV 2. No one has ever gone down on me with a cold sore but that’s not to say my rash wasn’t HSV 1. At this point, I don’t know what caused it since both tests were positive. I’d like to say since the varicella zoster test was positive for both antibodies that the rash was caused by that. The IGM, which shows active infection, wasn’t a low positive either, it was very high and I had that done two weeks after the onset of symptoms. I didn’t have the HSV test until last week.
Anyhow, I feel disgusting, depressed, alone, and angry. I don’t want my husband to touch me, I keep thinking of all the times I let my kids drink after me and I get sick to my stomach thinking I could’ve spread HSV 1 to them. It wasn’t until my rash that I found out they don’t do regular screenings for HSV unless you have symptoms, which sucks! I didn’t know much about HSV Until my symptoms. Why isn’t there more education surrounded this? Because it’s common? Shouldn’t that be more of a reason to educate? I know it’s not the end of the world but with me being on an immunosuppressant drug, it’s hard not to freak out because if HSV 1 caused the rash it means I get to have more of them. And, my PCP isn’t recommending continuous treatment unless I get several “outbreaks”.
My husband knows but I don’t know how to tell him how I feel about this. It’s hard to put into words how gross and dirty I feel about it. How the unknown is driving me crazy. Is it VZ or HSV that caused my rash? If it’s HSV 1, I don’t want to risk giving it to him thought I might have already done so, considering the “shedding” process I knew nothing about.
Any advice or encouraging words are appreciated.
Topic: Ulcers bursting help
So this morning I woke up with blood all over me vag area. I think it’s the ulcers or boils idk but I can’t stop them from bleeding and is the bleeding a good thing? So anyway o proceeded with washing the area and letting it air dry and applied my olive oil and trátese oil treatment for soothing.I am at work now so I do have a Pantiliner in but i was told not to…how do I stop this bleeding or what to do? I keep reading to keep the area dry but that almost impossible why I’m at work.. please help
Hey, I’m 23 and I’ve been going through one hard ship after another! Life is kicking my a** all the way to the end! I’ve been waiting for the ( this is my year moment) for three years and each year just gets progressively worse lol 😂. Anyways last year I met a guy and I thought he was great well he turned out to be a total mistake… it lasted 6 months and it turned out he was in a relationship! Isn’t that nice.. so after that was over I found out I was hpv positive. Now I new a little about it due to when I was 16 I had abnormal paps and did loads of research about it and i knew I fought it off once I could do it again… then the GW showed up 🤦♀️ I thought “ what next!!” I did a treatment and they were gone and I realized they are absolutely no different then a wart on your finger… so I go a month with a tip top lady bit.. no sexual interactions I was gonna focus on myself… then come the ex that I was engaged to and madly in love with… he came and apologize to me for everything he ever did to me.. and of coarse he was my best friend and I expected his apology and let him stay the night.. the next morning I was in excruciating Pain !! I thought well maybe I was torn a little bit ( that’s normal for me) I went to work and came home an the pain was just steady and not going away so I found that odd. I took a look 👀 and what I saw was not normal, it looked like a a big burn and like skin was coming off of that stop .. in the same place my GW WERE! I waited a few days and I started getting sick 😷.. sore throat and swollen tonsils. I ran to the Er because the doctors office couldn’t get me in and I had to go back to work ina few hours.. i was tested positive for strep! Okay so I’m not feeling well because big strep. I start a round of antibiotics and everything should go back to normal. Right? Effing wrong! I woke up the next morning and my groin nodes were sooooo swollen I could hardly move. I had what looked like very infected ingrown hairs on my public hair area they were big under the skin and red and hot to the touch.. so that’s what I went to the doctors for. That’s when she said “ you tested negative for herpes 3 months ago! But I’m worried that this is what it is “ she did a swab and I’m still waiting for the results. The next day I woke up and I had what looks like tiny ulcer spots on my vaginal area.. I have no idea what I thought they were. I was like they didn’t start as blisters so there is no way it’s herpes? Right? Again soo wrong.. they just won’t go away..then of course since I opened my mouth the blisters started !!! They are everywhere… between my buttcheeks which are probably the worst in feeling and spreading.. all over my labia manjora… just everywhere.. I call up the guy that gave them to me.. he had since then gotten back together with his girlfriend.. of course my luck right ? I ask him if he has experienced anything and he just starts screaming at my saying I’m trying to ruins his life and get his girlfriend mad at him and that I’m just crazy and want him back.. I’m like absolutely not I don’t care about you at all I care about my health! So I gave up on his help and just started treating myself.. enter my heartbreaking moment… I’ve been talking on and off with this man I’ve always had feeling for for 5 years on and off, we have never been intimate, never had a relationship because of either one of us were in a relationship or distance.. well we are both single finally and we are both wanting to be together .. finally… he is stationed in Texas.. and He wants me and my son to move out there so we can start a relationship.. now this has come into the picture and I have no idea how to tell him… he has always been my goal and after 5 years of friendship and always going back to each other I don’t know what he will say.. I’m trying to disclose to friends first so telling him won’t be as hard .
Topic: Vaginal Irritation
I’m Maggie (24) and have been diagnosed for 10 months. Although this isn’t necessarily a group I asked to be apart of, I’m glad that there are communities to help one another. I’m slowly accepting my diagnosis.
I got my first OB last August, 2 months into a new relationship. Since then I had countless visits to the GYNO and it turned out I had trich as well…which was left untreated for a while by my doctors 🙄.
Now that everything is “cleared up” in terms of tests and treatments, I still suffer from a vaginal rawness/itchiness or tenderness. I take Valtrex daily. I’ve seen similar threads on here about the herpes itch which I am just learning is a thing. Is this tenderness normal with this virus? Does it get better over time?
Some days I feel sad and lonely with this virus, question if my vagina will ever feel back to normal. I appreciate any insight. Thanks.
Viewing 15 results - 1 through 15 (of 97 total)
Viewing 15 results - 1 through 15 (of 97 total)