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  • #39229

    In reply to: New diagnosis


    I am going through this exact same thing right now. My breakout started last Thursday and is going strong. I went to the clinic on Friday to get tested but results are not back yet but there is no way mistaking what this is.

    I have been reading a lot and can share what I have been doing which seems to help.

    Sometimes I soaked in warm water with Epsom salt but not for too long. I pad dry with towel and/or use a hair dryer on low setting.

    I have read that the key is to keep it dry – aiming to dry out the open sores once the blisters break. After each pee I use disposable wash cloths to clean and then pad dry

    And then. I blot the sores with corn starch and put in cotton underwear. I have found this to be the most soothing and sometimes adds some protection to the areas on my next pee.

    I am also taking 4000mg of l/lysine and 1000mg of propolis. All of this is from what I’ve read on the internet as my results aren’t even back yet so I have yet to go and see the doctor again for treatment.

    I am 7 days in and have s feeling that I am starting to heal. Pees are still painful but not all of them.

    I have also read the 1st is the worst.

    So, Galina, you are not alone, I am going through this right along with you girl!


    Hey, I’m 23 and I’ve been going through one hard ship after another! Life is kicking my a** all the way to the end! I’ve been waiting for the ( this is my year moment) for three years and each year just gets progressively worse lol 😂. Anyways last year I met a guy and I thought he was great well he turned out to be a total mistake… it lasted 6 months and it turned out he was in a relationship! Isn’t that nice.. so after that was over I found out I was hpv positive. Now I new a little about it due to when I was 16 I had abnormal paps and did loads of research about it and i knew I fought it off once I could do it again… then the GW showed up 🤦‍♀️ I thought “ what next!!” I did a treatment and they were gone and I realized they are absolutely no different then a wart on your finger… so I go a month with a tip top lady bit.. no sexual interactions I was gonna focus on myself… then come the ex that I was engaged to and madly in love with… he came and apologize to me for everything he ever did to me.. and of coarse he was my best friend and I expected his apology and let him stay the night.. the next morning I was in excruciating Pain !! I thought well maybe I was torn a little bit ( that’s normal for me) I went to work and came home an the pain was just steady and not going away so I found that odd. I took a look 👀 and what I saw was not normal, it looked like a a big burn and like skin was coming off of that stop .. in the same place my GW WERE! I waited a few days and I started getting sick 😷.. sore throat and swollen tonsils. I ran to the Er because the doctors office couldn’t get me in and I had to go back to work ina few hours.. i was tested positive for strep! Okay so I’m not feeling well because big strep. I start a round of antibiotics and everything should go back to normal. Right? Effing wrong! I woke up the next morning and my groin nodes were sooooo swollen I could hardly move. I had what looked like very infected ingrown hairs on my public hair area they were big under the skin and red and hot to the touch.. so that’s what I went to the doctors for. That’s when she said “ you tested negative for herpes 3 months ago! But I’m worried that this is what it is “ she did a swab and I’m still waiting for the results. The next day I woke up and I had what looks like tiny ulcer spots on my vaginal area.. I have no idea what I thought they were. I was like they didn’t start as blisters so there is no way it’s herpes? Right? Again soo wrong.. they just won’t go away..then of course since I opened my mouth the blisters started !!! They are everywhere… between my buttcheeks which are probably the worst in feeling and spreading.. all over my labia manjora… just everywhere.. I call up the guy that gave them to me.. he had since then gotten back together with his girlfriend.. of course my luck right ? I ask him if he has experienced anything and he just starts screaming at my saying I’m trying to ruins his life and get his girlfriend mad at him and that I’m just crazy and want him back.. I’m like absolutely not I don’t care about you at all I care about my health! So I gave up on his help and just started treating myself.. enter my heartbreaking moment… I’ve been talking on and off with this man I’ve always had feeling for for 5 years on and off, we have never been intimate, never had a relationship because of either one of us were in a relationship or distance.. well we are both single finally and we are both wanting to be together .. finally… he is stationed in Texas.. and He wants me and my son to move out there so we can start a relationship.. now this has come into the picture and I have no idea how to tell him… he has always been my goal and after 5 years of friendship and always going back to each other I don’t know what he will say.. I’m trying to disclose to friends first so telling him won’t be as hard .


    In reply to: Newly Diagnosed


    Herpes has associated negative emotional aspects. It’s a vicious circle, herpes can generate stress and stress weakens your immune system and it generates stress. I was very helpful this treatment of genital herpes.

    • This reply was modified 1 year, 3 months ago by  Liz65.



    I’m Maggie (24) and have been diagnosed for 10 months. Although this isn’t necessarily a group I asked to be apart of, I’m glad that there are communities to help one another. I’m slowly accepting my diagnosis.

    I got my first OB last August, 2 months into a new relationship. Since then I had countless visits to the GYNO and it turned out I had trich as well…which was left untreated for a while by my doctors 🙄.

    Now that everything is “cleared up” in terms of tests and treatments, I still suffer from a vaginal rawness/itchiness or tenderness. I take Valtrex daily. I’ve seen similar threads on here about the herpes itch which I am just learning is a thing. Is this tenderness normal with this virus? Does it get better over time?

    Some days I feel sad and lonely with this virus, question if my vagina will ever feel back to normal. I appreciate any insight. Thanks.


    oh wow, I got the messages now. Good they are going through. I don’t think name dropping is a problem – goodness knows I’ve dropped plenty. I’m assuming you made the thinning hair comment regarding lysine? This is not the first time I’ve heard this. I’ve also heard lysine isn’t so effective for HSV2, but the jury seems to be out on that one. I am not familiar with Hashimoto’s – a thyroid disease? – but it must be tricky to manage more than one chronic condition.

    I’m glad you read Christopher Scipio’s book, and had a counseling session. The book really calmed me down. Christopher actually lives very close to me – I’m from Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, and we texted back and forth for a while. He also goes by the name Ricardo Scipio – you might want to look that one up – interesting guy:) I’m a starving artist type and couldn’t afford his treatments, although I was most interested in his anti-viral gel, which contains irish moss/carrageenan. I’ve researched the carrageenan lubes, but haven’t found a ‘natural’ one with good ph and osmolality:

    You and I are in quite different situations. As said way back when, I am married and intend to stay that way for now. It’s a good thing my husband and I don’t have sex – that would be very awkward:) I am not seeking a life partner. But if I was, I would likely have many more doubts and misgivings, and would be quite uncertain about how to approach dating. Does a person post on a herpes only site? Does a person disclose in her profile, to weed out judgmental people? I have found so many lack education about herpes – I was no different, and if someone advertised it, I ran away fast. Or does a person wait until a promising relationship develops, then disclose and risk blowing the whole thing out of the water? Or, if outbreaks are few, does a person use condoms and not disclose at all? I have no answers, but know that one day I might face these decisions. So I can totally appreciate what people here are going through. Cheers,



    Thank you for your message. I truly hope you can move on from this life changing event. I was fortunate in that my bf got tested and diagnosed immediately, so there was no denial. He and I still see each other – even though he has HSV2 he uses a condom now, as I find his direct skin contact irritating.

    Not sure how frequent your outbreaks are, but I’ve only had a (very mild) one in 6 months. During this time I’ve had tremendous family stress, so consider myself lucky. My protocol is simple – Moducare for my immune system, Monolaurin during outbreaks, and the topical Manuka honey. There is lots of information about these things online, and they are easily available from iHerb. I also try to eat a healthy diet and exercise regularly, something I was doing before Herpes.

    I also found an almost humorous, but useful tip online, to deal with urine pain on sores. Sit on the toilet backwards when you pee – the toilet has a slight slope and reversing your position will cause urine to run forward, not back (!) It really works!

    It’s probably blasphemous to mention someone else’s book here, but I found ‘Making Peace With Herpes”, by Christopher Scipio, to be an extremely helpful resource. It helped to put things in perspective and gave useful treatment information.

    I too think it’s a little surreal to have survived this long, only to be caught out at 64. I admit I have not exercised enough caution in the past, and have been living on borrowed time for many years. I am glad I am not 20 – the news would have devastated my 20 year old self. This experience has been a real eye opener. I will never have unprotected sex again, and will approach any new partner with extreme caution. Even kissing is cause for concern. Goodness knows this could have been far worse – my partner could have had HIV.

    In spite of everything, I feel like I’ve dodged a bullet.

    I wish you well. Feel free to contact me anytime.

    Take care,



    I haven’t checked back here in several months, and am most gratified to read all of your responses. I have been truly blessed. It’s now coming up to 6 months from diagnosis, and I have learned so much. I had a second, extremely mild OB 3 months ago, but it’s been clear sailing ever since. I believe I am one of the lucky ones. There have been no doctors, nor have I taken any more Valtrex. I’m still on the Moducare for immune, but have discontinued the Monolaurin for now. (I did increase the Monolaurin during my second outbreak, which really only lasted for 36 hours). Still seeing the 3 very supportive men.The only thing that’s changed is that they now wear condoms. That and a nice cleansing shower afterwards. No big deal at all. For genital irritation I highly recommend Manuka honey. It’s kinda sticky but has worked where nothing else did. There is very little prodrome now, and I can forget I have this thing for days, weeks at a time. If anyone would like help with natural treatments, please ask. I would love to share. Best wishes to all, especially you fellow boomers. Rock on! Kati



    The reason for my seeking support and knowledge now is that I feel like I was in a bit of denial or nonchalance for so many years – I was diagnosed with HSV2 after having sex with a guy using a condom one time. The next year, I got married and didn’t disclose – I have other chronic diseases (type 1 diabetes and thyroiditis) and had had HPV / abnormal pap in college. Perhaps I thought this wasn’t as serious or required so much attention or didn’t want to admit that I could infect others, not sure now. But anyway, I very rarely had outbreaks and treated them much like the rest of my vaginal health – with T1D, I have frequent Bacterial and Yeast infections, and so was super aware of changes, would treat appropriately, and abstain from sex during treatment and outbreaks alike. And as I stated, never had frequent outbreaks. At one point during my marriage, I talked to my husband about it, he also had symptoms and we agreed that we didn’t have much information about who infected whom, although in retrospect, I probably was afraid to own up to it. He was probably cheating on me anyway, so he avoided the topic and we went about our lives.

    Fast forward I divorced my husband about 5 years ago, while pregnant with our second child. I started a wonderful relationship with a man a year after and still did not think about disclosing until I had symptoms, told him, and treated it. He took it very well, we had protected sex, we were diligent about checking each other for symptoms and outbreaks and we carried on. That relationship ended for other reasons after 3 years. To my knowledge, he did not contract HSV from me at all.

    Starting last summer, I began dating again, and definitely taking advantage of my 40-something sex drive, and was casually seeing a couple of men at the same time, mostly using protection until committing to one person about 4 or 5 months ago. I STILL DID NOT have ‘the talk!’ I guess I believed that because outbreaks were so infrequent, and I was so aware, that my risk of transmitting to him was very low – at least as low as him or I just being out and having sex socially would be. Meaning that the level of risk was equivalent to our previous sex lives experience.

    I had a recent outbreak following sex, just before he left to visit family on a vacation. I contacted him right away and told him that I had a HSV outbreak and he should keep an eye out for any symptoms. I again, took it seriously, but from a quite clinical point of view, and didn’t consider his possible range of reactions. He completely freaked out. Many angst-filled text messages (he refused to take my calls) it was CLEAR that he was operating from a place of fear and ignorance and I was completely oblivious of the impact that my blunt honesty would have on him. I still haven’t seen him in person, we plan to on Sunday, because following his trip, I am now on a work trip abroad. I feel like on Sunday I have to explain myself, my rationale, admit my mistake in not disclosing sooner, AND do some serious evidence based education with him. I feel pretty awful about hurting him and betraying him. I really would never have intended that, and that has been really tough on me, not that I expect any sympathy from him.

    His reaction made me dig deeper and seek more knowledge than I ever have on HSV. I asked the dr. for a culture, confirmed I have HSV2. I feel like the shaming, the unworthiness, the stigma, has all just come to a head with me, 18 years after initial diagnosis. I also read up a lot more on risk of transmission and prevention of symptoms, and am more educated so that I can talk to him about it. I still have many questions though.

    I’ve also realized, in this experience, that I seek a more informed, communicative, and loving partner, than he has ever been able to exhibit. Its a new relationship, and I had had some reservations about him in these areas, but whats super clear now, in how this whole thing has been handled, is that in his current state of being, he is not the right partner for me. Of course I feel terrible for having exposed him (although truthfully, he admitted to having HSV1) but I don’t believe he really knows his status, and will ask him to be tested.

    So, I’m here to learn from your experiences, and figure out where to go from here with my new attitude and information. And wish me luck, on Sunday, when I finally have ‘the talk’ that I should have had many months ago. Although, I bet I wouldn’t have even been in this relationship if I had disclosed before. I think he would have chosen fear and stigma over getting to know me. And that says a lot, I guess.

    Sorry for long intro.
    Peace & light & health


    In reply to: Question to dr kelly


    I have a very peculiar statement slash question…… I have been AVIDLY chasing ANY and ALL degrees and ways for Herpes treatment. I got online and found in the middle of a forum somewhere a woman that stated that Zim’s Max Crack Creme for lip treatment was according to her a VERY successful treatment when directly applied to a sore she got almost INSTANT success with both pain AND healing. I of course in FULL DOUBT but was willing to try ANYTHING at this point as i had a sore on my lip that was GROWING larger and larger. It is a SPLIT in my lip that of course is directly inline with saliva that contaminates it directly with the Virus Herpes with really no way to prevent it from getting worse. I searched HIGH and LOW for the Zim’s crack creme lip formula that the woman had directly mentioned had worked but could not locate it ANYWHERE!! Which of course made me even more determined to find a source. In my search i coming up short “we don’t carry that anymore” to “out of stock” to “NOT AVAILABLE” were repeatedly the website and outlet responses. In my frustration i decided i would just buy some Zim’s Crack Creme in another form and attempt to see if it helps AT ALL. I am a mechanic, so my hands are my LIFE. I was starting to see that my FINGERS where getting more and more sore as time went on. I realized that i had been using my hands to cup the water to rinse my mouth out while attempting to keep my mouth at least clean in my imagination. Knowing that just rinsing my mouth out helped nothing regardless of what mouthwash or dental rinse i used. So in this realization that i was spreading the Virus to my hands through rinsing them with my moth making contact with them. I decided to get at least a hand creme from the Zim’s line. in the mean time while i searched for Zim’s lip creme. I am in NO WAY trying to sell ANYTHING for anyone. However this stuff WORKS!!!! I lost ALL pain in my hands, literally INSTANTLY. I have no idea but have it does it’s thing but my suspicions that EITHER Arnica or Aloe Vera or in some way the COMBINATION of the two are the reason why it works so well. Like this woman i found who was just trying to HELP ANYONE that would listen, i want to HELP EVERYONE that is in pain, it is NOT EXPENSIVE it costed me like 6 bucks for the tube. I used it on the crack in my lip several times during the evening, the pain was effected IMMEDIATELY and the following day the sore is ALMOST totally gone. Now i don’t know if this will last or anything successful occurring with this Virus OTHER than simply RELIEF of THAT sore. But wen dealing with Herpes pain and it being SOOOO determined to STICK around no matter WHAT i tried THIS STUFF WORKED!!!! OMG success against Herpes in ANY form to me is a simple step FORWARD rather than struggling with attempts and going further and further BACKWARDS…… Just TRY IT, don’t ignore THIS post, like i said i FIX CARS i don’t sell magic potions of any sort. I just want people to see and FEEL the success that i FINALLY HAVE…. I am betting that is WHY the lip formula is gone everywhere as other people have figured this out as well, OR the evil drug companies have intercepted this and made it less available somehow. I am hoping that its just sold out because a drug company like Valtrex or whatever intercepting this treatment source would be absolutely SATANIC to prevent it from being used… Use it, JUST TRY it!!! then come back HERE and TELL people about it!!!! It is a hand cream but put it on a dried with a napkin cold sore and FEEL IT!!!!! This is my first morning after treatment so i don’t have any news about HOW LONG it will last but the split in my lip is almost entirely GONE!!!!! Talk about a Herpes SILVER BULLET……. i am finally able to SMILE this morning without getting a split open bloody sore lip…..


    I’m 64 and have been married for 40 years. My husband and I are like room mates and no longer have sex. 17 years ago I began seeing other men. I currently have 3 FWBs that I see occasionally – 2 I’ve known for 3 years and the third for 9 months. The 2 long term ones tested negatively for STDs when we met, as did I. The more recent FWB I took at his word when he said he’d never had an STD symptom. Silly me. About a month ago I was hit with the ‘mother of all yeast infections’ that quickly turned into something much worse. Herpes has always scared me, and as I read up on the symptoms I realized I was experiencing them one by one. It was horrifying.

    I was diagnosed with HSV2. The OB was harsh, complete with oozing, stinking sores, excruciating urination, fever, rapid weight loss, and extreme leg pain. 5 weeks later I’m a lot better, but still have significant genital discomfort.

    I informed my partners immediately. One of the long term ones has tested negative for HSV, for which I am extremely thankful. The second long term partner has not gone in for testing yet, but I’m optimistic he too will be negative. The 9 month FWB tested positive for HSV2. He still swears he’s never had any symptoms. Whether or not this is true I don’t know, but he remains serenely asymptomatic while I’ve gone through purgatory. My partners have all been extremely supportive.

    Like many I’ve run a gamut of emotions and am trying to sort them all out. After the first shock, the biggest challenge has been not to let this define me. The knowledge is like a stain that won’t wash out. I have learned so much, including the fact that HSV testing is not standard, so if I’d sent my 9 month partner for testing, I’d still be in the same situation.

    I fluctuate between disbelief, anger, resentment and uncertainty. I do not feel shame or embarrassment, just a little foolish for not being better informed.

    Figuring out a new sexual protocol has been interesting.

    I’ve had 2 sessions with Valtrex, and am now working on shoring up my immune system. Moducare is an immune balancer that helped my sick dog for many years, so I’m trying that. I’ve also ordered Monolaurin, an anti-viral, so will give that a go. I figure prevention is better than treatment. Still looking for a magic bullet for the nether regions.

    This is a very long post. It’s good to get it all out, as I often feel very much alone. If you have made it this far, thank you. Any tips on bolstering the immune system and calming the raging vulva will be most appreciated.

    My heart and hand go out to you all, and particularly to the baby boomers on here.




    I was diagnosed almost a month ago. The stigma and my ex-lover have been the biggest obstacles since I haven’t had to deal with severe symptoms. I contracted HSV-2 from my ex-boyfriend. I sought treatment for a yeast infection a few days after exposure, and requested a full STD screening. I tested positive via swab. Unfortunately, I slept with a friend/business associate before receiving my results. The yeast infection cleared within a few days of taking my meds so never in a million years did I expect to be HSV . Hours after receiving the devastating news I had to muster up every last bit of nerve and courage to tell my friend the news and he would need to get tested. He went that same day to my doctor for a blood test. The longest hour and a half of my life waiting with him to get called in for testing. He tested positive via blood test. This was one week after we first slept together, which now I’ve come to learn, if he didn’t have it before me, he should’ve tested negative. I told him a positive IGG blood test indicates he’s had the virus for at least 3 months, but he refused to accept the fact and blames me. Needless to say, we are not together and do not talk. I still have to deal with him for business matters. The hard part initially was the guilt and shame I felt thinking I had infected him. I was unable to deal with my own diagnosis because I was so preoccupied with his diagnosis and feelings. I’m still preoccupied, but I’ve also decided to accept I have a virus/skin condition and I will be ok. Most days I have anxiety, some days I forget. I work hard to ‘practice calm,’ and use other coping mechanisms I’m learning through Dr. Kelly’s support and coaching. I know it will be a challenge, but I’m determined to minimize it to eventually be an afterthought. This won’t define me. I hope to find support and encouragement in this forum, as well as provide support and encouragement when I can. We’re not alone and we’re still the same amazing beautiful women we were before the news. Let’s keep shining and not dim our own light.


    I am soon to turn 70, white hair and herpes come along.
    Divorced in 2003 after 35 years of a monogamous marriage,I met and dated (my now Husband ) in 2003.
    Diagnosed in 2004 age mid 50’s, He is a shedder, and no idea he had the cursed virus,(or so he says)
    I have been struggling with this awful Herpes for 13 years.
    I am so glad I found this forum today, I’m having a real bad OB today.
    Ran to the computer for a few more ideas for treatments and help.Finally a place to fall into when I’m Exhausted and feeling low.
    Hoping to manage this better for the next big OB~



    Hi. I am experiencing some of the symptoms of oral herpes. I have fever and muscle aches. Pain and itching sensation in the mouth sores is causing discomfort. I am having a severe toothache and my dentist suggested an emergency dental treatment in Toronto which is scheduled tomorrow. I am confused whether to undergo this procedure since I am having some symptoms of oral herpes.If I undergo this dental procedure will it cause any infection? Please advise.



    Hey!! I’m recently diagnosed with oral herpes and I’m under depression. I’m scheduled for chemical peel treatment from a clinic in Richmond Hill next week. I have read, one must be cautious when using peels if they have oral herpes. It seems the chemical peel can cause an outbreak and thus leading to scars. Is that true? Any thoughts?



    Hi. I am recently diagnosed with oral herpes. I am depressed. I am scheduled for a dental implant treatment in Oakville next week. Now I am not sure whether I am eligible to undergo this procedure. Will a dental treatment aggravate herpes? Please share your thoughts on this.

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