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  • #39253

    Topic: HSV-2


    Like many of you, I was recently diagnosed with HSV-2 and it has been a whirlwind!
    The feelings of sadness, madness, shame, embarrassment – you name it! all there. My experience with this virus has been so weird. I want to know if there are others having symptoms in the same order.

    So, it first started with this burning sensation whenever I peed. I went to urgent care and they thought I had a yeast infection so I got meds for that. At the time, all blood work showed negative for all STDs. I continued taking the medication but urinating was becoming more painful. Went back to urgent care, they took a swab, and put me on Valtrax just in case the worse happened. After taking Valtrax for two days, the burning slowed down and I learned to pee in a position so that the pee would not touch the walls. Unfortunately, I got the dreaded news that I was HSV-2 positive. Suffice it to say, I’ve been a mess since the news.

    Medication was making me feel better. But after finishing my first round of valtrex, I started to feel a burning sensation on my mouth and my lips started to get very dry (like when cold wind hits you). I started putting aquafor on my lips to keep them moist. That helped. But then I started seeing small bumps on the corners of my lips. So, I knew a cold sore wants to come. I’ve been using campo-phenique, Lysine, apple cider vinegar, tea tree oil, and coconut oil (saw all these methods that have worked for YouTubers). Blisters formed and the bumps never grew. I’m now at that phase were they feel really dry. I’m wondering if it will scab over eventually or what? because they never really became that horrible. Or I don’t know if they will manifest themselves more in a couple of days. This really has me on edge because I’ve never suffered from skin problems on my face. I have back ache to top things off – been using heat pads for that.

    I thought my vaginal issues had subsided already. But itching has commenced again!! I had to get up at 2 AM to fill my tub with warm water and sit for a while. I then added apple cider vinegar; doesn’t sting that much (well, at least for me); that helped me sleep + 800 mg. of ibuprofen.
    What do you guys use for that itching? I’m continuing with apple cider vinegar and adding aloe vera gel. It’s kind of helping. I just don’t want it to get bad to the point I can’t walk. So far, I’ve been able to manage most symptoms. I don’t know if these are all just part of my first outbreak or if they are separate episodes.

    I know I wrote a lot! lol. I hope I get more insight from you 🙂



    Hey guys I’m Jordan. I’m 23 & I just found out about my diagnosis. I tested positive for HSV 2 & I’m heartbroken… idk how long I’ve had it cause I just started showing symptoms so I went to the dr & that’s when they told me. I’m on medicine but I’m so scared & anxious & my self esteem has dropped so much. I’ve been searching for online support groups but I could find any especially in this area. I wanted to know how to deal w/ it & how to “shake” this feeling cause right now I feel horrible. My girlfriend knows & she understands & we plan on taking the necessary steps to protect her but I’m just hopeless. Im not sure how I can deal w/ this for the rest of my life. Any advice would be helpful, thank you ladies 🙂


    Hello, everyone. I was diagnosed with Hsv2 last week. I have no idea how long I’ve had it, as I have had these symptoms for years. “You have a yeast infection. “You have BV.” “You have hemorrhoids.” You get the idea. Anyway, after taking this week to process everything, I’ve accepted it. Even though I’m devastated, I’m determined to get through this one minute at a time. At this point, my biggest fear if transmitting this to my children, whether it be through a diaper change or bathtime. I would never be able to live with myself. What if I got distracted by “Mommy, Mommy, Mommy” & forgot to wash my hands? Have I ever done that? Please tell me I’m over thinking this. I won’t even bathe them without gloves now. I even use gloves while using the bathroom, showering, etc. I’m driving myself crazy! HELP!!



    It’s been 3 days since I was told by a doctor I have herpes, I can’t say I took the news very well (anyone else come from a childhood filled with fear mongering techniques by their religious parents?), I cried a bit in the doctors office, and at home. I somewhat got over myself by the next day, calming down about what it means to have herpes. It was time to focus on immediate symptoms, specifically painful ones, the worst of which being urinating.

    Every time I need to go to the bathroom I find myself pacing around the apartment, scared, after the few minutes it takes to even get myself in the bathroom I’m sitting, then standing up, then sitting down again. I grab the small hand towel I set out just for this reason, shove it in my mouth, stare at the wall, begin the pep talk “it’s only for a minute, you’ll feel so much better after you’ve finished. This is the worst the pain will be, ever, it only gets better from here”

    I still have a hard time, but the stream comes, I feel it hit every bit of skin, every red, painful lesion stinging as if a jellyfish was trying to fit itself into the vaginal canal I so desperately wanted to not be mine in that moment.

    And then I’m done, just like that. 20 minutes to build it up, 2 minutes to be done, I feel pathetic, I know, it’s not, but still..I feel f*cking weak.

    thats been the worst part for me, everything else I don’t mind too much, well, besides the fact that I can’t really workout, or dance, and I work as a performer, so my first outbreak is also an impromptu work vacation, apparently.

    I have a few friends being supportive of my new diagnosis, I told my sisters but they mostly just brushed over it and started talking about their day. Oddly enough, two weeks prior to my diagnosis I began dating a doctor, not OB/GYN, he’s an anesthesiologist, but still, it’s one of the more interesting coincidences I’ve experienced.

    So far it’s been nice seeing the way he stares at my medication going on about dosages and what he’s given the same medication to his patients for, but it also scares me, at time I feel like a frog waiting to be dissected. I should just be appreciative of it.

    Last night I went to stay in his apartment (we live in the same building) which was fine, he did some work, we watched a film, then we went to bed, simple, relaxed. Everything was good, it was nice to sleep next to him, but then comes morning, and I’m waking up having to pee.

    I felt panic, embarrassment, and anger all at once, and he’s laying with his arms wrapped around me sleeping like a baby, I think that was what really brought on the anger, I was jealous that he was okay, and I wasn’t, and then, laying there an extra 15 minutes with a full bladder, partially because I wanted to feel his arms around me, partially because I was too embarrassed to do anything else, I just kept telling myself “he’s an anesthesiologist, he deals with people in pain constantly, he understands what it means to have herpes” and I still felt like absolute shit, even typing this I’m upset by the situation. I had to lean over to him and as simply put as possible say “I’m going downstairs” and gave him a kiss on the cheek, his grunted response exhibiting his relaxed state, and I walked out of his apartment, then I ran to the elevators, I let it go too long, I was too self conscious.

    Now we’re back in my apartment, back to the bathroom, teeth clamped over cloth, white knuckles as I grab onto whatever I can find, screaming into the cloth. I think I let myself scream a little louder this morning, just from the frustration of it all, I couldn’t stand him, or anyone, seeing me like this, I can barely stand seeing myself like this.

    but the first outbreak is always the worst, right?


    Thanks for sharing. Diagnosed today. Never had an outbreak before and haven’t been with a guy in 2 years. Suddenly I have symptoms. Googling like crazy and lysine seems to be something that might help as I was vegan for awhile. Like you, I am thinking I will never have another relationship. At this moment that seems ok!


    Hi Ladies,

    So glad I found this website and a place to openly discuss my hsv2. As stated in the title I was exposed and diagnosed with hsv2 in April of this year. I contracted it by a guy I been knowing for years and thought I trusted. Like most I was scared, pissed, sad you name it. My first outbreak was the worst like most people experience. I was given valtrex to suppress the outbreak then experienced a second outbreak that was kind of painful by not like the 1st one. After I started doing more through research of what I could do to help suppress the symptoms naturally. I use Lysine that was purchased from my local grocery store and also I take Olive Leaf extract pills. This helps boost the immune system and fight viruses inside the body. I naturally have a weak immune system so I take things to help boost my immune system, which I feel is what will help me have less to no outbreaks. Also, Vitamin C is a great immune booster as most know. I have come to terms with having hsv2 and don’t want it to define my life. When first diagnosed with hsv2 I did feel my life was over, the first thought was no one is going to want to date me and I may not be able to have kids. This of course is NOT true after speaking with two of my physicians. I just wanted to be of encouragement to anyone recently diagnosed with hsv2 and feels alone.



    This is all very new, and still very shocking and confusing for me. I believe I contracted HSV 1 genitally 10 months ago. I felt weird zapping/shooting pains down below, but no sores. The pains lasted all but a day and went away. Time to time I experienced weird stomach sensations similar to a UTI, but did not have a UTI. Long story short, I have not had a typical outbreak. Just very mild irritation is all. 6 months after the initial contact with the person who has HSV 1 orally, I had two IGG blood test that said negative for both HSV 1 and 2. I finally went in and had my irritated spot swabbed which confirmed HSV 1. How could the blood tests not have picked this up? Why are my symptoms mild and not of typical herpes lesions. I feel like I have had symptoms every month since June. But again, my symptoms are strange and not the typical tingling, etc. are swab tests ever wrong? Could this be something else? My physician has put me on valeted, and honestly, I feel no different. I thought HSV 1 genitally rarely had recurring outbreaks. Needing as much information/advice possible. Thank you.


    Hey everyone, I’m 22 years old and I recently found that I have genital herpes symptoms. I have been dating my current boyfriend for about several months now and I had him checked for STD’s before we did anything sexual. 6 days ago we were grinding, no intercourse, and a few days later I had the symptoms. I know for sure he gave it to me and it hurts to think that the guy I care about gave me an incurable illness. He denies having it and I haven’t told him. I’m scared. I’ve only slept with one person my whole life as I’m so scared of getting STD’s and now I’ve got this to worry about. I’m in complete shock! I haven’t told anyone about this, and I don’t want to because I know I will be looked down on. I just had my first outbreak and I’ve heard it’s supposed to be the worst so here’s hoping it gets better here on out. I’m scared about having to deal with these symptoms for the rest of my life, and I’m so young as it is. I’m just praying that it gets better, I don’t know what to do. Has anyone on here tried antiviral drugs? Do they help at all? Also, can anyone please tell me how to deal with the symptoms? Thanks!



    My name is Natalie and I’m 31 years old I have been in a monogamous relationship with my boyfriend of 13 years. About 2 weeks ago I started having symptoms of what I thought was a UTI, burning during urination, and by day 3 my vagina felt swollen by day 4 there were what looked like blisters along my labia and my butt cheeks the pain was horrible I went to the doctors as I could no longer bear the pain. A swab was done and sure enough the rules came back HSV1. At hearing those words I felt nothing at first I was numb but not too long after it hit me like a ton of bricks I have something incurable how could this happen! I am still trying to process this. I told my partner he has been supportive but soon thereafter guilt sets in for him as he came to the realization that when he was 13 he had a bad bout of cold sores all over his mouth and nothing like that had happened since but he did have one bump on his inner lower lid and I guess ignorance got the better of the both of us and we didn’t realize the virus lays dormant and once you have a cold sore it’s already in you and of course we did not realize it could be transmitted from his mouth to my genitals. My partner is filled with guilt that he is the reason I am infected I keep reassuring him it’s not his fault but emotions are high and all over the place right now. I feel so many things and have so many questions like can my boyfriend pass the oral hsv to my mouth by kissinge or am I immune because I already have the virus I’m scared to kiss him and we just don’t know what we are doing…



    I will start by saying I have NEVER told anyone my truth and have never shared with anyone other than my gynecologist. I am hoping that by telling my story here I will find the confidence to share it with a potential partner. My reason for not sharing has been embarrassment and fear of being looked at differently or rejected. Also, I don’t want “friends” telling other “friends” or anyone else knowing my personal business. For example one of my best friends who I usually confide in made me aware years ago of another mutual friend who was devastated by a diagnoses. I am pretty sure it was herpes and I wanted to reach out when I was diagnosed but I couldn’t because I wasn’t supposed to know she had it. (crazy huh) She has since been in an amazing long term relationship and I want guidance on how to share with a potential partner and what her ups and downs were but I can’t ask.

    My Truth…
    I have probably had herpes well over 25 years but was diagnosed almost 4 years ago. As Dr. Kelly states in her book, Drs. sometimes brush it off for various reasons. I remember telling my gynecologist in my late 20’s (I’m early 50s now) that I had the strangest symptoms. Whenever I got my period I would get a rash on my right hip. He lightly said “Oh it’s probably just herpes” and moved on. I now know that it was the symptoms of herpes. Honestly I am glad I wasn’t made aware then because I don’t know how my life would have turned out or how I would have handled it but I often wonder if I have exposed anyone else unknowingly.
    Originally I diagnosed myself. I have always been conscious of my health, getting yearly exams including checks for STDs. I ended up getting a cold sore under my nose and went to the pharmacy to get an ointment. Because I am also indecisive I couldn’t figure out what to get so I asked the pharmacist. He informed me it was a virus that was internal and I should try the Abreva. What…. an internal virus! I turned to google when I got home and realized the images staring at me on the screen looked very familiar to what I experienced monthly on my thigh. Yes I said monthly! The blessing is I don’t have vaginal issues, my symptoms are sacral meaning I “only” get a small patch of bumps on my thigh or on my buttocks.
    My marriage was causing severe stress for unrelated reasons and my symptoms were out of control. Fast and frequent when one would leave, another would come. I had to confide in someone so on my next visit to a new gynecologist I stated “I need to tell you something….I think I have herpes” His reply was ….is that all? What? Long story short I had a blood test done to find out I have HSV types 1 and 2.
    The original plan was to take Valtrex only when I had an outbreak but they were too frequent. My doctor couldn’t believe that I experienced them once or more a month. I have been on suppressive therapy for almost 3 years and it has been a God send.
    I have been following a cleanse that has helped me to lose weight ONLY to find out that the foods required cause outbreaks! Protein bars, meal replacement shakes, protein powder, and nuts. I have been eating this way DAILY almost 2 years. By reading Dr. Kelly’s book I know this is a definite no no. I am so lost at this point I don’t know what to do or eat. Strenous exercise…..what? I am now on a journey to heal from within and following Dr. Kelly’s book. I do know my emotions trigger outbreaks. I can feel the tension in my back when something or someone gets on my nerves or I get stressed. I have found solace in the PinkTent website and am Optimistic that I can eliminate my symptoms altogether.

    I have met a man that I am quite interested in. We have similar marital situations and have been communicating well over a year and have a chemistry that you know sex is forthcoming. We’ve even talked about it. I have to tell him of my issue but I don’t know how, where to begin, or what to even say. The caveat is we work together. I am terrified of how he will respond. My fear is having a coworker knowing something so personal about me if it doesn’t work out.

    Any suggestions or guidance is appreciated!



    So I was just diagnosed with HSV-1 today. I’ve been researching online to see how this will affect my life now and I have several questions I’m hoping someone here can help me answer.

    1) My initial outbreak was a tiny ulcer on my genitals. I went into the clinic the day after my initial symptoms and got anti-virals and it subsided after a few days. I haven’t had any signs of herpes in my mouth…I don’t think. I had a small bump on the inside of my lower lip but it didn’t hurt in the slightest and went away after a day or so and these bumps are something I have had waaaay before my initial outbreak. Could these bumps in my mouth be from HSV-1 all this time and I just had no idea until it reached my genitals? I guess my first question is, how obvious are oral herpes outbreaks? Could that have been one? And since I have the HSV-1 virus does that mean I will inevitably have an oral outbreak?

    2) My second question (the one that originally brought me here) is about how to have sex now. I’m not gonna lie, this diagnosis has probably stopped me from having sex for quite a while just because of the mental component, but I want to be well educated on this topic. In my research I came across the information that non-spermicidal lubricant often has nonoxynol-9 (N-9) which irritates the vagina and can cause outbreaks. I was incredibly irritated to find that its nearly impossible to find information about what products I can use that DO NOT have N-9. I found a certain lubricant that is recommended for people with herpes but I’m more curious about condoms, or condom brands that don’t use N-9. What does “natural” condom mean? Will I always have to use non-lubricated condoms? I know these questions might be dumb but I’m just having a hard time coping with this and I’m finding it stressful that a virus this common is so hard to study 🙁

    3) I think one of the hardest most stressful parts about this diagnosis is how to tell my friends and family. I told my twin sister who was very supportive and awesome about it, but I have no idea how to approach it with my friends. I don’t want to share drinks or lipstick or any of that with them anymore to avoid the risk of passing the virus onto them. I realize that this is low risk but I’m trying to be careful. Have any of you told your friends? If so, how? And are there any tips you can give me? I love my friends and I think they’d be supportive but I’m just terrified that they’re going to look at me differently, even though they’re well aware of my sexual history (girl talk and all that). I’m just worried about the social stigma surrounding the virus and I don’t want my friends to see me as “dirty” or a risk to them in any way.

    Sorry I know this post is long and I didn’t even realize I had this much to say until I started typing. Thanks for sticking with me this long. Any advice will help! I’m so glad I’ve been able to join this community and read your guys’s stories. It really helps knowing I’m not alone in this. Thanks!


    • This topic was modified 6 months, 1 week ago by  cowgirl222.

    In reply to: Just diagnosed hsv 1


    I think having a conversation is okay when your like man something is up I had to go to the doctor they ran some tests. You don’t know and that’s being honest. Until the doc calls. Then it’s not so much as a shock. I hate to say people’s reactions are not always understanding but if he doesn’t understand then he’s not worthy on you. My ex broke up with me saying it was all me. However, I never had any symptoms. I just went in for a check up. He want worthy of me. We are all here together


    In reply to: HSV1 and disclosure


    Hi Renata-

    All great questions. Sadly, there is not a ton of valid info about herpes because it is very common and not terribly worrisome.

    The only way to tell where you have HSV1 is by having an outbreak. From the sounds of it, you are an asymptomatic carrier of HSV, which means you carry the virus but do not experience symptoms. 85% of the population who has herpes are asymptomatic carriers and the majority of the population has the virus. So, you’re not alone.

    HSV1 can be oral, oral and genital or just genital.

    My best advice would be to tell partners what you have had a blood test and HSV1, most commonly ‘cold sores’ showed positive but that you’ve never experienced an outbreak. This does not mean that you can’t pass it along, unfortunately, but the risk is lower.

    Check out The Facts on the Herpes drop down on this website, it’s very informative (if you haven’t already). Also, I really like this video. It’s helpful, too.

    I hope this helps.

    • This reply was modified 6 months, 2 weeks ago by  Happyhopeful.


    Hello all, this is my first post. I did a routine blood panel for STI’s and asked to make sure a bunch of tests were run including for Herpes. Came back positive for HSV1 but not HSV2. I was told that HSV1 could be just oral or both oral and genital…not sure if it can be just genital? In any case, how is one to find out if it’s genital or not? Do you disclose if you are HSV1 but not HSV2? I have no symptoms on or in mouth and never had. I can only gather that I’ve contracted it somehow in the last 8 years because my son is 8 and I was tested when I was pregnant for everything and everything was negative. I’m not that sexually active…aside from some make outs with my ex boyfriend that i’ve known 20 years. So do I tell everyone that I have HSV1. What is the standard protocol or is there one? Also is there a way to find out if it’s oral vs. genital or both? thanks. any advice would be helpful.


    In reply to: A new beginning


    Oh sweet girl. Let me just say that all of this resonates with me. I was diagnosed in March of 2018 after I started dating an ex (whom I knew was really controlling and had some seriously dark energy), and I too felt very overwhelmed, angry, violated, etc. And my initial outbreak was very painful as well, it was everything I could do to even make it off the couch to get the kids to daycare in the mornings, and it was extremely painful to do anything. BUT….and I want you to hear this….in this diagnosis I have found so much SOUL HEALING. I am learning how to honor my body, and respect and love myself. I have learned how to listen to my body as I learn to identify my triggers. I too rarely doctor for anything (because I don’t need to) and to receive this diagnosis and start on the anti-virals (and find a dosage that was helpful to me) was very overwhelming. But you will learn how to manage symptoms, and you will find wisdom in the wounding in this. It is a journey deep into self love, self forgiveness, and self care. I’m so glad that you found this place to land where we can love on, encourage and come alongside of you. Sending so much love, healing and light your way today. XOXOXO

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