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  • #45164
    Leah
    Participant

    Hi everyone I’m newly diagnosed with herpes. Im just trying to figure out my triggers and if I’m having a break out or what could possibly be going on down there?? Any advice

    #45147
    bouhop2
    Participant

    Hi! I was diagnosed with hsv a few months ago. Like you I have done a lot of research and this is what I am doing. I take lysine, vitamin C with Zinc, a multivitamin with B complex as well as a daily probiotic drink (Amazing Greens). When I stopped it for a few days I got symptoms almost immediately so taking these daily seems to help. I think the key, for me at least, is supporting my immune system. So I’m working on always getting my 8 hours of sleep too. Hope this helps.

    #45145
    mollymm10
    Participant

    I’ve always been careful with my sexual partners. I also haven’t had many. I started seeing someone and it got serious, quick. We had sex with condoms and eventually stopped using them. I had asked him about testing and he said he was in the clear. I also hadn’t known how many partners and how recently he had had sex. I trusted him. Three months in the relationship I was diagnosed. I was in shock and shut down. He said he didn’t know. I felt beyond betrayed. Eventually I said, “we need to learn how to tell people if we ever break up”. He said, we’re never breaking up. The stress of herpes went away when I realized he was the one. 3 years later we broke up. So hear I am feeling the stress and depression of a breakup with someone I thought I’d marry, along with having a new world of realizing I’m going to have to date with herpes for the first time ever.

    #45142
    yepmetoo
    Participant

    Hi, I was diagnosed with genital herpes 5 or 6 years ago during my first outbreak. I had one small sore fairly far into my vaginal opening. I haven’t ever had another outbreak. I get paranoid every time I ever feel anything uncomfortable in that area, but as far as I know, I have never had an outbreak. Lucky, I know. However, I don’t really know what it feels like and if I would recognize the symptoms. Recently, I felt some discomfort in the area and had a look. At first, I was sure it was an outbreak by the way it looked (one small white-ish looking spot. not really a blister though). But it was gone in less than 2 days. Is that possible? Sometimes I have tears especially after sex, so I’m not sure if it was just that or if it was an outbreak.
    any insight?

    #45137

    In reply to: 25 years old with hsv1

    Phyllis
    Participant

    Hi Soso,

    I am so sorry you have been diagnosed with HSV-1. You seem to have a lot of worry and concern about the virus and spreaging it.

    I think the more you learn & read about it, the better you will feel! I take acyclovir daily to prevent outbreaks of my HSV(2) & that has definitely helped me a lot.

    You may want to talk to your doctor about a prescription for an anti-viral medecine to prevent outbreaks.

    HSV-1 is extremely common, I found this online:

    How common is herpes simplex?

    ‘Herpes simplex is widespread around the world. About 2 in 3 people worldwide (and up to 80% of Americans) contract HSV-1 by age 50. About 15% of 15- to 49-year-olds contract HSV-2.’

    Hoping those statistics make you feel less alone. You are not alone, it is a very common virus!

    #45136
    Soso
    Participant

    Hello everyone, I’m Soso. I recently been diagnosed with hsv1 and I’ve been very depressed. Although I caught chicken pox in childhood I never knew that it was hsv because no one told me about it. I had my first cold sore ever on Halloween of last year and haven’t had one since (thank god) I have so many questions and concerns that doctors that I’ve been going to have just shrugged off. It’s so depressing to not have anyone to talk to about it because nobody cares. I hope to make friends. I’ve been sitting here going crazy for about a month now and I just want to get to some type of peace.

    Questions I have about it is, am I still contagious without the cold sore? Like can I touch my lips. If I’m eating or drinking something and it spills on my body will it transfer that way? If I’m in the shower and the water runs from my lips down my body can it transfer that way as well? Even if I wash my face? If I drool in my sleep do I have to immediately get up to wash my face?

    Sorry if it’s alot but that’s literally what’s been running though my mind I’m sitting here washing my self with soap and water if I feel like I got my spit anywhere on my face or body. I’ve even started wearing face masks after reading that your saliva is infected. I’m just going crazy and extremely traumatized and don’t know what to do or what not to and some answers and advice would really help. Thanks❤️

    Risegodess
    Participant

    Hi all. I have been recently diagnosed with hsv 2 and i am keen on treating this with natural remedies. I have been doing hours of research since diagnosis and wanted to know of other peoples experience with natural treatments. Whats worked, what hasnt etc.

    I have ordered monolaurin and waiting for it to arrive. My lysine arrived yesterday and i have began taking it as a supplement. I also applied some of the powder straight on to the ulcers. It did hurt a bit but i powered through. When i woke it was the most relief i had felt since the begining of the putbreak. Could be coincidence?

    Anyway.. please reply with your thoughts and experiences. Thanks so much. This is definitely a lot to process.

    #45129

    In reply to: Second Outbreak

    Lily
    Participant

    Hi Lovely, I’m currently going through my 4th outbreak since being diagnosed in August last year… and none of them have been as bad as the first, they have all still been fairly painful! Are you being prescribed any form of antiviral (acyclovir is the most common) which should clear it up?

    #45128
    Lily
    Participant

    Hi Lovely, I have a pretty similar story to you. In august last year I got diagnosed with genital herpes after getting it from my boyfriend, who is the only person I have ever slept with, thinking I was pretty much safe from catching any STDs… I had mixed feelings when I first got diagnosed because part of me was scared he would leave me and part of me was so frustrated that he had given this to me. I know he didn’t give it to me on purpose, and I’m sure your boyfriend didn’t either! If he is supporting you, and looking after you while you are going through this, try not to resent him for it. It is hard, I would definitely say this is the hardest thing we have been through in our relationship, but if you communicate and care for each other, you will be absolutely fine! As you haven’t been diagnosed too long ago, you aren’t sure how it’s going to impact you just yet, you may be lucky and never have a flare up again but if you do have recurrent flare ups, you can have suppression therapy to prevent it. It can be hard to forgive your partner for giving it to you, especially when they have given you genital herpes from a cold sore so they don’t even understand the pain you are going through, but I would say as long as he is supporting you through it, you’ll be able to get through it together!

    #45127
    c3820220
    Participant

    I was diagnosed with genital herpes 3 days ago now. My boyfriend has coldsores and passed the virus to me. I can’t seem to get over the fact he’s passed it on to me maybe I’m clouded by the fact it’s all fresh and I’m in an immense amount of pain but I feel so resentful towards him even though he says he didn’t know he could pass this on to me. Part of me feels like having coldsores should’ve made him more aware. It’s a new relationship and I hadn’t seen him have any outbreaks when I was with him. How can I move past this and not let it ruin our relationship. I know I’m probably just wanting to blame someone right now but I just hope this passes. I’m not sure we’ll be the same again

    #45108
    Ann
    Participant

    I was diagnosed at 18. Im almost 32. I have always felt how you feel. I was an undiagnosed depressed perwon prior to this and it made it worse for me.

    I have dated. It haa not been easy. Some were ok with it and we had sex. But others… I have heard terrible things. Things that I already feel about myself. But having someone say those terrible things is hard. But I am still trying.

    I take a suppressant. Thankfully ive never had a break out. I was diagnosed not long after i ended the relationship and been on suppressants since. It has helped in that aspect.

    You are not alone in your feelings.

    #45107
    Ann
    Participant

    Hello. (I realize after writing this all out how long it was but please bare with me) As my title states, it will be 14 years I’ve lived with herpes this coming year. It has been a very hard 14 yrs. I am finally reaching out after all this time because I have never come across a person in my situation that can relate and understand. I never talk about it or very very rarely talk about it with anyone. If I do mention something, its very broad and the conversation is over after a minute. A few people in my life know but they will never understand my feelings. This is my first ever attempt at a support group. I hope to find women who share my experiences and feelings and to be able to actually talk about it.

    I guess I should start from the beginning? I started dating a guy I had no business dating. I was 18 about to graduate high school and he was nearly 10 years older than me. It was a rebound from my first ever boyfriend who broke my heart. I lost my virginity to him just shy of my 17th birthday. Any way, I only dated the rebound guy for 3 months. I wanted to call it off after 6 weeks. He was emotionally abusive and would throw things at me but made sure they never hit me.I never broke up with someone before. It took me another 6 weeks to distance myself and finally call it off just after graduation.

    I had my annual OB appt a month or two later and we randomly checked for STDs. I was heart broken when she called me to tell me I had genital herpes. I reached out to my first boyfriend to let him know and he tested negative. There was only 1 other person I called and freaked out on him, crying and yelling. He had an indication that something could be up but never told me. My first boyfriend and I rarely used condoms. Bad habit learned and carried on on to the rebound. I was 18, right out of high school and thought my life was over at that point. I have always been self conscious, shy and had body image issues. I was also an undiagnosed depressed person. Well after finding out my new diagnosis, the depression got worse. For years up until recently, I was told its just anxiety, your not depressed.

    So I’m 18, starting college and finding out I have genital herpes. I focused on my school work and regular work. It helped by keeping me distracted. I did not have sex again until after I turned 21 nor attempted dating anyone. I was ashamed. At this point, a lot of things changed in my life. Right after my birthday in January, I found out I had thyroid cancer. Benign thankfully but still cancer nonetheless. Had my surgery in June and went back to work after 6 weeks even though the doctor highly recommended I was out for 3 months. I worked at a pizza place prior to surgery, living on my own and had a car payment. I was barely making it by as it was. I immediately started working 2 jobs. I barely slept or ate. If I did, it either pizza or food from the gas station I also worked at. By the time my meds were adjusted correctly from the surgery, months later, I had gained 80lbs in that time frame. Maybe 6 months? While all this was going on, I started sleeping around. A friend I had shared my secret with said I need to live my life and I did not have to tell ppl I had it as long as I was safe about it. So I did just that. I started drinking heavily as well that year. Going to the bar any chance I got and going home with whoever bought me drinks. I refer to it as my slut year. We all have them I suppose.

    Well the year ended, my roommate and best friend was going to move in with her boyfriend. So here I am at the end of my 21st year, past broke, slight alcoholic, slutting around, and 80lbs heavier. I ended up moving back home with the parents before Christmas in 2012. Here begins the severe depression. I also stopped having sex again at this point. I slept any time I could, ate my feelings and hid myself away from the world. I had lots of friends. I stopped talking to all of them except my 1 best friend who has always been there for me. Fast forward to 2015, I started school again. Still havent dated or had sex with anyone. I graduated in 2017 and started a job right away at a medical office. At thia time I started to feel a bit better so I tried dating again. My first date was late spring in 2018. I was so nervous. I had a panic attack on my way to meet him. I couldn’t breath, I was shaking, sweating and crying uncontrollably. My bff calmed me down but was still shaking when I meet my date. It went ok and I ended up telling him on the second date. I didn’t want to waste his time with me and liking me if he wasn’t ok with the one part of me. He was the first guy I had shared it with. He took it ok and we talked for awhile but never went anywhere. Still haven’t had sex at thia point.

    I have talked to a lot of men. I never knew when the correct time was to tell someone. I was online dating and my thought, again, was to not waste their time. So I would share with some of them after we talked for awhile. Some very terrible things were said to me over and over again. Depression spike again. I stopped dating. I tried on and off over the years since then.

    Jump again to Oct 2019. I had bariatric surgery. My weight was out of control and tried many things over the years and could never lose weight. I was nearly 280lbs. I started losing weight and felt a bit better. Another jump to March 2020 and covid. I worked in a specialist medical office. We could not close. My coworker left for another office in may and I ended up being the only receptionist until october. I was alone for 6 months in a busy office. A lot of things fell to me. Correction, everything fell on me. The doctors would come up to me asking how to order something. I was having problems with how I spoke to some patients but I was so stressed, started gaining weight again and my boss was horrible. One example, doc wants a CT on a patient who just found out they had cancer at 4pm on a friday. These require authorization from insurance. I had a part time girl who came in on Wednesday and was told by my manager that it can wait until so and so came in on Wednesday. Said patient then calls Monday afternoon or Tuesday asking for an update on CT scan. I would be the one to say it wasn’t even started yet and this obviously upset the patient. I started an HR case against her. She wrote me up 2 times after that within 6 weeks. It put me on probation which I got through just fine. 1 month after it endes, 6 months after the HR case, I was fired for basically asking a patient a question to determine the urgency of it. I was devestated. This was the beginning of 2021. Begin another spike of depression.

    2 weeks before I was fired, I went on a date for the first time since 2018. It seemed to go ok and he was ok with my secret. We had sex. This was the first time I had sex since the end of 2012. Its the end of 2020. I called it off after 3 months. He wasn’t for me At this point, I was unemployed, super depressed and had no idea what to do with life. Thankfully I had a part time job already but it was only 8 hrs a week. I knew I needed to speak help for my depression. So after years and years I started seeing a counselor and doctor. Finally diagnosed as depressed. At one point my mommy mentioned phlebotomy as a possible career. There was a huge shortage do to covid. Its been 1 year at this point. I looked into and met with an instructor about taking a course. I signed up to begin in October 2021. I took the entire year off to focus on myself. I still worked part time and was able to pick up some hours but no more than 20. I tried a few different meds throughtout the year. I started taking one around the time I started school in October. I have been on it since then.

    Begin year 2022. I get hired on the spot as a phlebotomist in January. I’ve been excelling. I finally found the right path. My depression medication has been a god send. I have never felt this good in my life. I am happy, most days. I dont get easily angry or upset. I really have never felt so good. Its amazing to realize that I’ve been undiagnosed for so long. Things may have been different. I started dating again, talking to more men than I ever have. I did go on a date recently but still havent had sex since beginning of 2021. Its been almost 2 years.

    Overall, thats my story up to now. For the most part. I am still struggling mentally with the genital herpes. For as much time that has passed, I still feel ashamed and disgusted with myself. I still get told or called terrible things by people and I cant help but agree with them because I already feel that way. Im nearly 32. My last boyfriend was when I was 18 and ive had sex with 1 person in the last 10yrs. I am scared of relationships. I dont know how to be. I accepted so long ago that I will just be alone and no one will ever love me. I still feel like that still sometimes. I try not to be in that mind set but its hard to break something you truely believed for so long. I am trying to get out of my comfort zone since I’ve started feeling better about myself. But now I feel extremely lonely and almost desperate feeling. I still feel disgusted with myself most of the time. I just want someone to talk to when I start having doubts and bad feelings regarding my herpes.

    I know this was super long and if you read all of it, thank you for listening. I just want support from someone who truely understands how I feel about this part of myself. Thank you again for listening.

    #45106
    Ann
    Participant

    Hello. (I realize after writing this all out how long it was but please bare with me) As my title states, it will be 14 years I’ve lived with herpes this coming year. It has been a very hard 14 yrs. I am finally reaching out after all this time because I have never come across a person in my situation that can relate and understand. I never talk about it or very very rarely talk about it with anyone. If I do mention something, its very broad and the conversation is over after a minute. A few people in my life know but they will never understand my feelings. This is my first ever attempt at a support group. I hope to find women who share my experiences and feelings and to be able to actually talk about it.

    I guess I should start from the beginning? I started dating a guy I had no business dating. I was 18 about to graduate high school and he was nearly 10 years older than me. It was a rebound from my first ever boyfriend who broke my heart. I lost my virginity to him just shy of my 17th birthday. Any way, I only dated the rebound guy for 3 months. I wanted to call it off after 6 weeks. He was emotionally abusive and would throw things at me but made sure they never hit me.I never broke up with aomeone before. It took me another 6 weeks to distance myself and finally call it off just after graduation.

    I had my annual OB appt a month or two later and we randomly checked for STDs. I was heart broken when she called me to tell me I had genital herpes. I reached out to my first boyfriend to let him know and he tested negative. There was only 1 other pwraon. I called and freaked out on him, crying and yelling. He uad an indication that something could be up but never told me. My first boyfriend and I rarely used condoms. Bad habit learned and carried on on to the rebound. I was 18, right out of high school and thought my life was over at that point. I have always been self conscious, shy and had body image issues. I was also an undiagnosed depressed person. Well after finding out my new diagnosis, the depression got worse. For years up until recently, I was told its just anxiety, your not depressed.

    So I’m 18, starting college and finding out I have genital herpes. I focused on my school work and regular work. It helped by keeping me distracted. I did not have sex again until after I turned 21 nor attempted dating anyone. I was ashamed. At this point, a lot of things changed in my life. Right after my birthday in January, I found out I had thyroid cancer. Benign thankfully but still cancer nonetheless. Had my surgery in June and went back to work after 6 weeks even though the doctor highly recommended I was out for 3 months. I worked at a pizza place prior to surgery, living on my own and had a car payment. I was barely making it by as it was. I immediately started working 2 jobs. I barely slept or ate. If I did, it either pizza or food from the gas station I also worked at. By the time my meds were adjusted correctly from the surgery, months later, I had gained 80lbs in that time frame. Maybe 6 months? While all this was going on, I started sleeping around. A friend I had shared my secret with said I need to live my life and I did not have to tell ppl I had it as long as I was safe about it. So I did just that. I started drinking heavily as well that year. Going to the bar any chance I got and going home with whoever bought me drinks. I refer to it as my slut year. We all have them I suppose.

    Well the year ended, my roommate and best friend was going to move in with her boyfriend. So here I am at the end of my 21st year, past broke, slight alcoholic, slutting around, and 80lbs heavier. I ended up moving back home with the parents before Christmas in 2012. Here begins the severe depression. I also stopped having sex again at this point. I slept any time I could, ate my feelings and hid myself away from the world. I had lots of friends. I stopped talking to all of them except my 1 best friend who has always been there for me. Fast forward to 2015, I started school again. Still havent dated or had sex with anyone. I graduated in 2017 and started a job right away at a medical office. At thia time I started to feel a bit better so I tried dating again. My first date was late spring in 2018. I was so nervous. I uad a panic attack on my way to meet him. I couldn’t breath, I was shaking, sweating and crying uncontrollably. My bff calmed me down but was still shaking when I meet my date. It went ok and I ended up telling him on the second date. I didn’t want to waste his time with me and liking me if he wasn’t ok with the one part of me. He was the first guy I had shared it with. He took it ok and we talked for awhile but never went anywhere. Still haven’t had sex at thia point.

    I have talked to a lot of men. I never knew when the correct time was to tell someone. I was online dating and my thought, again, was to not waste their time. So I would share with some of them after we talked for awhile. Some very terrible things were said to me over and over again. Depression spike again. I stopped dating. I tried on and off over the years since then.

    Jump again to Oct 2019. I had bariatric surgery. My weight was out of control and tried many things over the years and could never lose weight. I was nearly 280lbs. I started losing weight and felt a bit better. Another jump to March 2020 and covid. I worked in a specialist medical office. We could not close. My coworker left for another office in may and I ended up being the only receptionist until october. I was alone for 6 months in a busy office. A lot of things fell to me. Correction, everything fell on me. The doctors would come up to me asking how to order something. I was having problems with how I spoke to some patients but I was so stressed, started gaining weight again and my boss was horrible. One example, doc wants a CT on a patient who just found out they had cancer at 4pm on a friday. These require authorization from insurance. I had a part time girl who came in on Wednesday and was told by my manager that it can wait until so and so came in on Wednesday. Said patient thena calls Monday afternoon or Tuesday asking for an update on CT scan. I would be the one to say it wasn’t even started yet and this obviously upset the patient. I started an HR case against her. She wrote me up 2 times after that within 6 weeks. It put me on probation which I got through just fine. 1 month after it endes, 6 months after the HR case, I was fired for basically asking a patient a question to determine the urgency of it. I was devestated. This was the beginning of 2021. Begin another spike of depression.

    2 weeks before I was fired, I went on a date for the first time aince 2018. It seemed to go ok and he was ok with my secret. We had sex. This was the first time I had sex since the end of 2012. Its the end of 2020. I called it off after 3 months. He wasn’t for mw. At thia point, I was unemployed, super depressed and had no idea what to do with life. Thankfully I had a part time job already but it was only 8 hrs a week. I knew I needed to speak help for my depression. So after years and years I started seeing a counselor and doctor. Finally diagnosed as depressed. At one point my mommy mentioned phlebotomy as a possible career. There was a huge shortage do to covid. Its been 1 year at this point. I looked into and met with an instructor about taking a course. I signed up to begin in October 2021. I took the entire year off to focus on myself. I still worked part time and was able to pick up some hours but no more than 20. I tried a few different meds throughtout the year. I started taking one around the time I started school in October. I have been on it since then.

    Begin year 2022. I get hired on the spot as a phlebotomist in January. I’ve been excelling. I finally found the right path. My depression medication has been a god send. I have never felt this good in my life. I am happy, most days. I dont get easily angery or upset. I really have never felt so good. Its amazing to realize that I’ve been undiagnosed for so long. Things may have been dofferent. I started dating again, talking to more men than I ever have. I did go on a date recently but still havent had sex since beginning of 2021. Its been almost 2 years.

    Overall, thats my story up to now. For the most part. I still struggling mentally with the genital herpes. For as much time that has passed, I still feel ashamed and disgusted with myself. I still get told or called terrible things by people and I cant help but agree with them because I already feel that way. Im nearly 32. My last boyfriend was when I was 18 and ive had sex with 1 person in the last 10yrs. I am scared of relationships. I dont know how to be. I accepted so long ago that I will just be alone and no one will ever love me. I still feel like that still sometimes. I try not to be in that mind set but its hard to break something you truely believed for so long. I am trying to get out of my comfort zone since I’ve started feeling better about myself. But now I feel extremely lonely and almost desperate feeling. I still feel disgusted with myself most of the time. I just want someone to talk to when I start having doubts and bad feelings regarding my herpes.

    I know this was super long and if you read all of it, thank you for listening. I just want support from someone who truely understands how I feel about this part of myself. Thank you again for listening.

    #45104
    woody2408
    Participant

    I’m 22 and just being diagnosed with genital herpes. im also having such a horrific outbreak I’ve barely been able to move for 5 days. im still in shock and feel like I’ve been stripped of my sex life. I feel as though nobody is going to find me attractive anymore and nobody will want to be in a relationship with me. I know its common but im finding it really difficult to come to terms with this. has anyone on here started dating again with herpes? how much does it affect your dating and how do people generally react when you tell them? I feel like never going on another date again.

    • This topic was modified 5 months, 1 week ago by woody2408.
    #45080

    In reply to: Advice/Help please

    m42412175
    Participant
    This reply has been marked as private.
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