Search Results for 'Transmission'

[Clara]

Hello my sisters. I already feel like part of the family. I am 70 years old and was diagnosed with 2 back in 2014. I had been married for 13 years at that point. I was horrified of course. Blaming myself and going through all the unhealthy thoughts we have all experienced. My husband was never worried about the diagnosis. I don’t believe he over became infected, at least no symptoms, He passed away almost 2 years ago. Now, I am back dating. I met a very nice fellow and have enjoyed several dates with him over the last 3 months. We both have a strong Christian faith and have not had sexual intercourse up to this point. I do feel our relationship is progressing and it may soon be time to have “The Talk”. I have been reading Dr. Kelly’s book as well as “The Good News About the Bad News” in preparation for this day. I have read conflicting information about kissing and transmission of HSV2. This has me mortified because this relationship involves a lot of kissing. So many articles talk about kissing being one of the means of transmission. Then, I’ve read in other places HSV2 absolutely does not spread from the genitals by kissing. If it is spread by kissing then I probably have infected him. For which I will never forgive myself. Does anyone have any input on this? I’m already concerned about rejection when I tell him about my infection.

[finn012361]

I wrote the woman who does the positively positive podcast asking a similar question after my diagnosis and unfortunately this was her reply…

‘As far as legal action, you would have to be able to prove that you didn’t have it beforehand, which means previous negative blood tests for antibodies – which most people don’t have. You would also need his test results proving he did have it, dated before you contracted it yourself, in order to prove it was intentional transmission. If you do have those, you can think about the next thing you’ll need to prove – that you have not had intimate contact with anyone other than your husband. It’s a hard thing to prove, and lawyers will rip your character apart trying to discredit you. You will also need to prove that you did not know he had it – which can come down to a messy he-said/she-said.
If money for lawyers and time aren’t a constraint, you can give it a go and I’d definitely be interested to hear what happens.’

It seems very similar to other sexual assault cases and the burden of proof is placed on the victim unfortunately and the nature of this virus allows people lacking morals to abuse others. It is really sad and hard to accept… at least it has been for me.

I do believe it is necessary to ‘expose’ the behavior because I think silence only helps the perpetrator continue to potentially infect others although even exposure is no guarantee. In my case, my husband knew that he was infected for more than 30 years and he had never disclosed to any of his partners before having sex. If even one of those previous partners had addressed his behavior, he may have corrected himself and treated me differently, but of course I have no way of knowing this for sure. I told mutual friends and his mother. No one really wants to hear this or know it… so please steel yourself for unpleasantness should you decide to go this route.
I wish you the best, take care of yourself.

[Pichukita]

I wanted to share that there are people in this world who can look beyond this diagnosis. Don’t lose hope in people. I say this as someone who chose to be with a man who had hsv2. I met him online and because I am careful and cautious I made him get sti testing. When he came back positive for the blood test for hsv2 I had a choice. Stay with him or leave. I chose to stay with him and eventually I chose to stop using condoms and got it. I dont regret meeting him or the life we have because it is so much more than just 2 people that have herpes. We got married, had a baby and now are on baby #2. We are taking all the precautions to not pass them onto our children and there is no reason to believe we ever would since we both have hsv2. We use proper hygeine and have normal boundries with baby (no bathing together). I had to have a c section because after 30 hrs of labor I failed to progress so this next baby will also be via c section. I took the antivirals during the end of my pregnancy just in vale I go into natural labor I want to minimize the risk of transmission as much as possible. Anyways I just wanted to share my story because I see so many people terrified of never finding love again. I found love with someone with hsv2 so I encourage yall to keep an open mind and an open heart. The main deciding factor for me being ok with it is that this diagnosis does not reduce your life expectancy and is not contagious unless you are having sex/touching privates. So it’s manageable so long as you take standard precautions.i hope this helps! You can have herpes and live a beautiful normal life. Ill add that only my husband and I know about our diagnosis. I have told my doctors, my sister and my best friend. No one else needs to know unless you want them to. Disclosure is only for people who need to know. And if they aren’t touching your genitals then they don’t need to know is how I view it.

[hopeh5154]

Does anyone have kids? I’ve had herpes for a while and I’ve been in denial. I do everything so that I keep my toddle safe. I read about this stuff and I take meds but not always. My outbreaks aren’t bad but I’m still afraid to transmit it to my toddle. I’ve never sat down with an expert and asked how to avoid transmission and just know what I’ve read. This page seem to have a good Dr and I decided to join. Can it be transmitted through sharing a bottle of water or utensils? I always try to be careful with these stuff. Any moms out there?

[Maria89]

I just copied and pasted something I wrote to another user with the same case.

Here are some facts you need to know:
– HSV-1 –> 50%-80% of people have it.
– Normally, you catch the virus during childhood with the kiss of a relative.
– When you catch as a kid, you build immunity and won’t get it genitally.
– What happened to you is that you didn’t get herpes type 1 in your childhood and initiated your sexual life without antibodies. You got it from oral sex. That was your first exposure to the virus.
– Genital HSV-1 viral shedding (when you shed the virus without symptoms) is 2-5%.
– It’s super rare to transmit HSV-1 through genital to genital contact, you get it from oral sex.
– So, if you are not having an outbreak with genital HSV-1, you don’t need to disclose it (scientifically, not morally). Just give your body a year to build antibodies.
– Since the sacral ganglion is not its’ favourite place, people with HSV-1 have fewer recurrences. The average is 0,7 per year (3-8 when people has HSV-2). Most people with HSV-1 have 1-3 outbreaks in the first 2-3 years, and then no more. (There are people with G-HSV1 that would say that they have more recurrences, but still, it’s rare). I have only had 2 in seven years. The first one was pretty bad, the second one was a rash and a cut 7 months after. After that, not at all. Nothing.
– Scientifically, disclosure of genital HSV_1 shouldn’t exist since the transmission from genital to genital is extremely low.
– Since almost everybody has it, you can just tell your new partner to get tested, chances he already has it are high. Since my diagnosis, I always asked my partners to get tested (I wouldn’t like to get HSV-2), from 10 guys I dated, just one didn’t have HSV-1. Three knew they had it because they remember having cold sores when they were kids (confirmed with the test), and 6 had it and didn’t even know it. They just knew it with the test. Fact: I’m in my 30s. So at 30, the stats of HSV-1 are 70% at least.
– I disclose this by saying, I have the virus that causes cold sores, and it is herpes type 1. And then I explain the differences between type one and two. I say that I was unlucky to get the virus during childhood, and that was unlucky but lucky enough to catch Herpes type one, the nicer one, and that disclosure of genital HSV-1 is more trust than transmission.
So, if your new partner has it, it’s okay, you don’t ping-pong the virus.
I have never been rejected (and no, I’m not a hot girl. I consider myself average). I explain all this by looking at their faces, being calm, and I make sure to explain the differences, I also give them the fact sheet from herpesopportunity.com, and I normally ask them to listen to a podcast called “The Big herpes episode with Terri Warren” on youtube. In my experience, it’s really refreshing when my partners listen to this podcast. It answers all their questions.
– Last thing. Don’t read or try to watch videos about herpes. A lot of people and even doctors don’t know this information and say “herpes is herpes”. I would suggest reading about it with Peter Leone, Terri Warren and Hofdsman. They are researchers dedicated to this virus.

[Lorena]

Hello. Today I got my results from the IGG test, showing a 1.30 for HSV-1. The IGM dropped a negative result for both. The doctor was very sarcastic and cynical. He didn’t give me information on how to prevent transmission or treatment. I felt judged. I feel devastated, lonely, disgusting and that my life is over. Please, share as much information as you have. I’m feeling like I shouldn’t love anymore.

[Maria89]

This reply has been marked as private.

[pinktentuser]

Hi VCRJ

Thank you for sharing this. I’ve recently been diagnosed with GHSV1 so it’s a fine line on disclosure. Terri Warren (a herpes specialist) says its important to disclose for trust than it is for transmission as GHSV1 is quite a benign infection.

I find it comforting knowing you said there are plenty of people that will accept you simply for the fact they like you. Thank you for sharing your perspective.

[Maria89]

Olivia,

Here are some facts you need to know:
– HSV-1 –> 50%-80% of people have it.
– Normally, you catch the virus during childhood with the kiss of a relative.
– When you catch as a kid, you build immunity and won’t get it genitally.
– What happened to you is that you didn’t get herpes type 1 in your childhood and initiated your sexual life without antibodies. You got it from oral sex. That was your first exposure to the virus.
– Genital HSV-1 viral shedding (when you shed the virus without symptoms) is 2-5%.
– It’s super rare to transmit HSV-1 through genital to genital contact, you get it from oral sex.
– So, if you are not having an outbreak with genital HSV-1, you don’t need to disclose it (scientifically, not morally). Just give your body a year to build antibodies.
– Since the sacral ganglion is not its’ favourite place, people with HSV-1 have fewer recurrences. The average is 0,7 per year (3-8 when people has HSV-2). Most people with HSV-1 have 1-3 outbreaks in the first 2-3 years, and then no more. (There are people with G-HSV1 that would say that they have more recurrences, but still, it’s rare). I have only had 2 in seven years. The first one was pretty bad, the second one was a rash and a cut 7 months after. After that, not at all. Nothing.
– Scientifically, disclosure of genital HSV_1 shouldn’t exist since the transmission from genital to genital is extremely low.
– Since almost everybody has it, you can just tell your new partner to get tested, chances he already has it are high. Since my diagnosis, I always asked my partners to get tested (I wouldn’t like to get HSV-2), from 10 guys I dated, just one didn’t have HSV-1. Three knew they had it because they remember having cold sores when they were kids (confirmed with the test), and 6 had it and didn’t even know it. They just knew it with the test. Fact: I’m in my 30s. So at 30, the stats of HSV-1 are 70% at least.
– I disclose this by saying, I have the virus that causes cold sores, and it is herpes type 1. And then I explain the differences between type one and two. I say that I was unlucky to get the virus during childhood, and that was unlucky but lucky enough to catch Herpes type one, the nicer one, and that disclosure of genital HSV-1 is more trust than transmission.
So, if your new partner has it, it’s okay, you don’t ping-pong the virus.
I have never been rejected (and no, I’m not a hot girl. I consider myself average). I explain all this by looking at their faces, being calm, and I make sure to explain the differences, I also give them the fact sheet from herpesopportunity.com, and I normally ask them to listen to a podcast called “The Big herpes episode with Terri Warren” on youtube. In my experience, it’s really refreshing when my partners listen to this podcast. It answers all their questions.
– Last thing. Don’t read or try to watch videos about herpes. A lot of people and even doctors don’t know this information and say “herpes is herpes”. I would suggest reading about it with Peter Leone, Terri Warren and Hofdsman. They are researchers dedicated to this virus.

[Maria89]

80% of people has HSV-1 (oral).
16% has HSV-2 (genital).
Cases of genital HSV-1 are increasing, but it is necessary to know the differences.
Just 1-2% of people have oral HSV-2 because HSV-2 really really prefers the sacral ganglia. It is not its favorite place. You won’t get oral HSV-2 with a kiss.

Yes. Doctors say that everybody has herpes, but it is HSV-1.
You can get HSV-1 genitally, but it is nicer than having HSV-2 genital.
Since people acquire HSV-1 orally during childhood, you built immunity to get it in your genitals. You get HSV-1 genital when you enter the sex life without having the virus and antibodies.

HSV-1 Genital:
– HSV-1 genital transmission is extremely rare. You don’t pass it with genital to genital contact.
– You mostly get it with oral sex. Since the sacral ganglia is not its favorite place, viral shedding (when you shed the virus without symptoms) is extremely low.
– Outbreak frequency is 1.2 per year. Most people have 2-3 outbreaks in the first three years and no more after that.

HSV-2, Genital:
– It is mostly and exclusively genital.
– It doesn’t like the trigeminal ganglia at all. It is extremely rare to get oral HSV-2. Even if you get it, you will get one outbreak and no more.
– Viral shedding of HSV-2 is higher, meaning 15-30% of days you shed the virus without symptoms.
– Frequency varies from 3 to 6 per year.

I don’t agree when doctors say that everybody has herpes. Yes. Oral HSV-1.
They are similar, but it is important to know the differences as well.
You can transmit the virus even without symptoms, and disclosure to a possible partner should know it.

[funinthesun1984ad]

This reply has been marked as private.

[Pichukita]

For the whitlow, if you see a sore definitely keep it covered completely with a bandaid. If you are worried about transmitting it to baby make sure while you have an active sore to use gloves when you change/bathroom the baby. Probably overkill since just covering it up with the bandaid and preventing the skin to skin contact will likely prevent transmission.

When you dont have an outbreak try to remind yourself that the danger of transmission is minimal. If you feel you are getting several outbreaks then you may want to talk to your doc about staying on the chronic therapy and maybe even increasing the dose depending on how many outbreaks you are getting.

I have hsv2 and when I was first diagnosed last memorial day I did get 1 finger with whitlow. It has not recurred on my finger since. I do get recurrent outbreaks down south and take suppressive therapy for that reason. From everything I have read whitlow is far less common than the other outbreaks.. so just do everything that you can to not further spread it.. use a body gloves to clean down there when you have an ourbreak so you dont have to physically touch your sore..Once you have the virus its really about damage control and making it a normal part of your life. “I have to do xyz now and thats ok.” If you have a questionable sore just treat it as if it was one to be extra safe.

I have had the same fear about accidentally transmitting it to my family or friends. Just remember the more you stress the more outbreaks you are likely to get. So you can think of it as part of your treatment or therapy to calm yourself down when you start to panic and freakout. If you feel like you see a sore on the baby then just go get her tested. You don’t need to tell anyone or get anyone permission. Just for your own peace of mind that its nothing. And if it is something is is 100% better to know so that you can contain the issue early.

Hope this helps a little! I am actually trying to get pregnant with my first child. There are a ton of fears and questions but it will be ok. We have to remember that. Life doesn’t always happen the way we want it but we deserve all the good things in this life including having our family.

[Maria89]

Hi Carly,

Don’t freak out. I’d like to expand @Sister7277 explanation.
1. 50%-80% of Americans already have HSV-1, and normally oral. So the chances he already has it are high. If he has it orally, he won’t get it.
2. Genital HSV-1 transmission with genital to genital contact is extremely rare. Why? Because HSV-1 doesn’t like the sacral ganglia and it’s not its’ favorite place. Viral shedding is 2%. HSV-2 genital has 12%-20% of viral shedding (@sister7277).
3. You get genital HSV-1 from oral sex. If you begin your sexual life without having it. Normally, people get oral HSV-1 during childhood, so they are immune to get it in another part of their body.
4. HSV-1 genital has less frequency of outbreaks. It’s 1.2 per year.

Conclusion: You shouldn’t even be afraid of transmitting genital HSV-1 with genital contact. If you had oral HSV-1, and you were going to perform oral sex on a guy, yes, you should be afraid and disclose it. Disclosure of genital HSV-1 is more trust than transmission, dear.

So, you are fine. He didn’t catch it. Knowledge is power. Having HSV-1 genital is completely different than HSV-2 genital.
Calm down and get more information about HSV-1 genital. Chances you date a guy with HSV-1 and doesn’t even know are extremely high.
Watch on youtube an interview called: Herpes episode with Terry Warren. She is one of the best researchers about herpes. There you will get a lot of information. Even doctors don’t know the difference between HSV-1 and HSV-2 genital. You got genital herpes, yes, but you got the nicer one.

[KP]

Hey! Like Sister7277 said, condoms and no sex during outbreaks is the way to go.
The best practice is to use condoms 100% of the time, and put one on before any skin-to-skin contact occurs. Avoid sex during an outbreak, or any time you think you feel one coming on.

I’d read that taking a daily antiviral, like acyclovir, can reduce the risk of transmission to something like 4% when you also use condoms, etc. I took acyclovir for about a year, but am no longer sexually active and so I came off it. But it made me feel a lot safer and more confident when I was in a relationship, since I didn’t have outbreaks while taking it, so I didn’t have to worry about one popping up. We still used condoms, but the peace of mind helped.

[Manda]

From the research I’ve done you can’t pass herpes unless it is skin to skin. I was worried about transmission from toilet seats but the information out there says it can only be spread by sexual contact through both sex and oral sex.